Evasive Action (1998)

Evasive Action (1998)- * *1\2

AKA: Steel Train 

Directed by: Jerry P. Jacobs

Starring: Roy Scheider, Dorian Harewood, Clint Howard, Don Swayze, Ray Wise, Mallory Farrow, Ed O'Ross, and Dick Van Patten

When a group of dangerous criminals has to be transported, they’re corralled into a train car which is attached to a regular passenger train. Nothing good can come of this scenario, and, you guessed it, all hell breaks loose. When criminal mastermind Enzo Marcelli (Scheider) breaks his evil compadres out of their chains and commandeers the train, Sheriff Blaidek (Wise) is called in to handle the situation. The hapless and sympathetic prisoner Luke Sinclair (Harewood) is caught up in a situation he can’t control and must become the de facto hero. Will the train reach L.A. as it should…or will EVASIVE ACTION be needed?



Funny how these prisoner transports never go right. You’ve never seen in any movie a group of prisoners being shipped from one location – either by van, truck, train, plane, boat, or hovercraft – and then end up at their intended destination with everyone completely unscathed. They should really stop transporting prisoners altogether. Just leave them where they are. 

Anyway, it’s rather obvious that this is the DTV version of Con Air (1997), except it’s Con Train. As far as DTV train movies go, Evasive Action is better than Death Train (2003), Operation Delta Force (1997), and Derailed (2002), but not nearly as good as Hostage Train (1997). As far as Under Siege 2: Dark Territory (1995), it’s up to you to decide. Just why DTV filmmakers thought audiences would be so fascinated with trains remains unknown. It’s not exactly new technology. It’s not the 1800’s anymore. Presumably they thought countless people would see these train movies on video store shelves and shout “Coooooollll!!!” or “These people are on a TRAIN!! WOwwww!!” Surely there are some train fanatics out there, but how many could there be – and why did DTV filmmakers court them so heavily?



While Evasive Action itself is rather middling, at least the cast is here to help buoy it somewhat – of course there’s Roy Scheider, doing a standard baddie, Don Swayze doing a standard underling, Ray Wise is a standard Sheriff, and Ed O’Ross is a standard warden. Clint Howard isn’t exactly standard like the rest, but his character is really annoying, so I guess it’s for the wrong reason.



We were happy to see Dorian Harewood step out of the shadows of being a bit part or sideman-type actor. This has to be one of the few times he takes the lead, and we were glad for that. He’s rivaled only by one Mallory Farrow as Alex, one of the precocious little girls that these movies tend to have. Oh, and Dick Van Patten does a brief sit-down role as “Parole Officer”. It’s just like in A Dangerous Place (1994) where he played “Principal”. He deserves better – at least give his character a name.



Most of the funny stuff is saved for the end, and the end-credits song, “No Excuses”, is sung by Dorian Harewood himself. He did release an album in 1988 so it wasn’t his first rodeo behind the microphone. The song is one of the better things about Evasive Action.



It seems DTV producers around this time period had a “one-track” mind when it came to trains. Evasive Action is not the best, nor is it the worst, of this bunch. The cast helps keep it from going completely off the rails. But it’s not what we’d call a must-see.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Also check out write-ups from our buddies, Exploding Helicopter and Cool Target!

Killing Machine (1984)

Killing Machine (1984)- * * *

AKA Goma-2

Directed by: Jose Antonio De La Loma

Starring: Jorge Rivero, Margaux Hemingway, Ana Obregon, Aldo Sambrell, Hugo Stiglitz, Richard Jaeckel, Willie Ames and Lee Van Cleef

Txema Basterreneche (Rivero) is a simple truck driver who has enough problems in life with people trying to pronounce his name. The last thing he wants is more trouble. But that's just what he gets as he travels the highways between Spain and France as he hauls fruit. Evidently there is a French Produce Mafia who don't take kindly to Txema's fruit runs. The guys in the FPM (we assume that's the union initials for French Produce Mafia) are constantly calling Txema "That damn Spaniard" and "That Spanish bastard". Harsh words indeed, but things escalate from name calling and fruit-stomping to murder when the FPM burns Txema's truck - with his beloved Elisa (Obregon) inside.



Now burning with revenge, Txema hooks back up with former colleague Jacqueline (Hemingway). It seems that in their past, they were both part of a mysterious - and deadly - "organization". Now falling back on his old ways and killing skills, Txema starts taking out the trash - which is, in this case, a bunch of French produce truckers. Picot (Sambrell), Koldo (Stiglitz) and boss Martin (Jaeckel) are all on his list, but Txema eventually works his way up to the final showdown with arch-baddie and produce lawyer Julot (Van Cleef). Will Txema execute his final mission? And what does Tony (Aames) have to do with all this?



Well, you gotta give Killing Machine points for originality. We can't say we've ever seen what we would have to call produce goons before. That's right, produce goons. If you watch enough movies, and dig under every rock, you're bound to find something at least a little bit new and different. Despite some pacing issues, Killing Machine (AKA Goma-2, which is apparently some type of explosive), is enjoyable enough - a sort of European take on F.I.S.T. (1978) meets Death Wish (1974). 

A solid cast and music by the De Angelis brothers also help things along nicely. Revenge movies are among our favorites and it was nice to see fan favorite Jorge Rivero do what he does best. Evidently that includes punching French truckers. (How often do you get a chance to write - or read - the phrase "punching French truckers"? You gotta love it).



It was nice to see Margaux Hemingway, as she doesn't pop up too often around these parts, and you really have to appreciate her eye for art and home decor in the film. The legendary Lee Van Cleef was terrific as the main baddie, definitely a "boo-hiss" situation, and Richard Jaeckel as his underling was okay, nothing spectacular. 

The rest of the Spanish-language cast was fine too, including mainstays Sambrell and Stiglitz. The team-up we've all been waiting for, Jorge Rivero and Willie Aames, finally appears here. The rumors appear to be unfounded, as of this writing, that Willie Aames has legally changed his name to Willie Bibleman.



For an under the radar - or should we say under the CB - revenge film that should be more well known, do check out Killing Machine.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty