Karate Rock (1990)

Karate Rock (1990)- * *

Directed By: Fabrizio De Angelis

Starring: Antonio Sabato Jr., Dorian Field, Natalie Hendrix, Andrew Parker, Timothy Smith, Robert Chan, and David Warbeck



“Why don’t you go iron your tutu?”

Kevin Foster (Sabato Jr.) is the new kid in town. He comes from Oakland to live in Savannah, Georgia with his father John (Warbeck), a police officer. Inexplicably, this makes him the target of ridicule amongst the local bully population, who tease him by not only calling him “cop’s son” but also just “cop” (!) – so Kevin goes to the local discotheque, as all Southern teens were doing in 1990. He enters the “Rock Competition”, by which the European filmmakers must have meant “Dance Competition”. Naturally, Kevin wins, but that’s when all his troubles start.

A love triangle develops between Kevin, who likes Kim (Hendrix), and Connie (Field), who likes Kevin. Kevin’s interest in Kim, as well as his superior dancing abilities, really tees off the head bully and Karate champ, Jeff Hunter (Parker). Jeff gets really mad when Kevin bests him at a truck race through the “Tunnel of Death”, so Jeff and his goons beat up Kevin several times. Eventually, Kevin wises up and begins training with his father’s friend Billy (Chan), an older Asian gentleman who long ago swore off using his Martial Arts abilities but who now really wants Kevin to get revenge against Jeff Hunter. The two boys set up a final showdown at the local dojo. Who will be victorious?

Our old buddy Larry Ludman serves up a cross between Footloose (1984) and The Karate Kid (1984), but notice that both of those movies are from the great year of 1984. Today’s movie in question came out in 1990, and, for better or worse, times had changed. Maybe that’s why this never got any kind of a release in America. Anyway, it should be noted that there is no rock and very, very little Karate in Karate Rock. It’s maybe 85% Footloose and 15% Karate Kid. The box art, great as it is, is very misleading. It’s not the Martial Arts version of Body Rock (1984) that we were hoping for. But, in all fairness, even Sabato would have a hard time filling the shoes of Chilly D.

Sabato wears an oversized white cardigan and rents videos from a store called Video One. There was a Hard To Kill (1990) poster in the window, so presumably that’s what he was renting. In the same strip mall is the dojo with two names. It reads “Korean Karate”, and then, as if to correct itself, “Savannah Tae Kwon Do”. It’s easy to see why Kevin has such a crush on Kim. She has a fantastic sideways ponytail and wears triangular earrings. On the other side of the equation, Jeff Hunter has rockin’ after-market pink windshield wipers on his 4x4. It’s going to be a tough choice for her.

The Yaz-like synth disco score is by Donald Brent, who only has one other music scoring credit, another Fabrizio DeAngelis movie called Breakfast With Dracula (1993). That’s a shame, as we would like to look forward to more scores by him. As far as we can tell, neither score has been released on CD or vinyl to date. Speaking of sound, when the characters talk – in any setting – it sounds like they’re speaking into microphones with both the echo and reverb turned up. This unnatural circumstance leads to a lot of funny mishearings, such as when Kevin’s Black friend is introduced as “Chocolate Chip”. Sadly, his name isn’t Chocolate Chip, or even just Chip. Even still, the classic nerd, Mortimer (Smith), almost steals the movie. Maybe this is because we get such minimal Warbeck.

In the end, Karate Rock is a teen movie, and not the shirt-ripping fight-fest the box art seems to indicate that it is. Kevin doesn’t even start training until the movie is almost over. Perhaps the most interesting things about Karate Rock, seen from today’s perspective, of course, are its time-capsule points of interest. And also the fact that what you see here is what a bunch of European adults thought American teens were like. It’s a reasonably fun trifle, but it’s not, strictly speaking, an action movie.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Sniper: Ultimate Kill (2017)

Sniper: Ultimate Kill (2017)- * *1\2

Directed by: Cladio Fah

Starring: Chad Michael Collins, Tom Berenger, Joe Lando, Juan Calero, Felipe Calero, Danay Garcia, and Billy Zane

Our longtime friend Thomas Beckett (Berenger, of course) is now working for the DEA in Colombia. He’s down there because a drug lord named Jesus Morales (Juan Calero) is causing all sorts of havoc and mayhem by employing a sniper named El Diablo (Felipe Calero) to eliminate his enemies using the latest in high tech sniping technology. Beckett’s son Brandon (Collins), who is also an expert sniper (as you may remember if you’ve seen the latest spate of Sniper films) also travels to Colombia to try and take down Jesus Morales and El Diablo. Working with local agent Kate Estrada (Garcia) as well as John Samson (Lando), and, of course, Miller (Zane), will the power of everyone involved be enough to stop the sniper-on-sniper violence?

Here’s a question: why are there SEVEN Sniper movies to date? No, really. We demand answers. I want someone to explain to me why these stories need to be told over and over again. That, really is the main problem with this, the latest installment in the Sniper saga. It’s not a bad movie. It’s really not. It’s competently made, and delivers pretty much what you’d expect of a DTV Sniper movie from 2017. But that’s just it – I think it’s fair to say that this series has overstayed its welcome at this point, and even the movie at its best can’t overcome that. 

While it was nice to see both Berenger and Zane back together, they mostly stayed in an office capacity while young sniper Brandon got in on the action. Not to tempt any filmmakers out there who may be considering a Sniper 8, but we had an idea for what this movie should’ve been. The evil sniper puts Brandon in the hospital, so Berenger and Zane have to go back into the field even though they’re getting on in years, to put their combined skills together to get revenge and show they’re still the ultimate snipers. Well, the offer is on the table. Get in touch if you’re interested.

While Brandon is called “the best”, and he still calls his own father “Master Guns”, the problem is that Chad Michael Collins is still bland and faceless. You don’t know what he looks like even when you’re looking right at him. That aside, we do get some “bullet time” for a new generation, and there is a good amount of violence and nudity – probably because the filmmakers have to compete with big-budget Hollywood product like Shooter (2007) and Sicario (2015). Sometimes it tries to be overly slick, but not as bad as some other DTV outings we’ve seen.

We assume there has to be an audience for this, otherwise they wouldn’t keep making them. We applaud fan favorites Berenger and Zane for still even wanting to be involved. While, as we said, the movie itself isn’t bad, we can’t really recommend it unless you’re a die-hard Sniper fan. We suspect there’s only so much sniping a human being can reasonably stand.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett