12/08/2024

Seized (2020)


 Seized
(2020)- * * *

Directed by: Issac Florentine

Starring: Scott Adkins, Matthew Garbacz and Mario Van Peeples 







In his former life, he was a Special Ops professional badass known only by the code name Nero (Adkins). But today, he is simply a well-meaning dad. Trying to raise a moody teen son named Taylor (Garbacz) who has angst and questions about the loss of his mother, "Nero" now works in Mexico as some sort of IT security consultant. But Nero's past comes back to haunt him in the form of Cartel head Mzamo (Van Peebles). Mzamo kidnaps Taylor, secrets him away in a room that apparently is too cold, and forces Nero to reawaken his old killer instincts and kill off Mzamo's rivals in the drug trade. Nero doesn't want to do it, of course, but he is forced to, now with Taylor's life hanging in the balance.

Given a series of increasingly difficult and dangerous assignments, Nero is coerced into wearing a bodycam so Mzamo and his goons can have a watch party as they sit around, drink muchos cervezas, and chant "Ner-o! Ner-o!" just like the Jerry Springer audience of yore. Soon, truths are revealed, conspiracies get to the top, and familial bonds may be rekindled. All thanks to the healing spirit of violence. Can Nero punch, kick, and shoot his way to the truth - and his son's love? SEIZE your remote control today!

Seized, the eighth collaboration between director Isaac Florentine and star Scott Adkins, is a fast-paced and entertaining action romp that delivers yet more goods to fans. The title Seized may put you in mind of Taken (2007), Abduction (2019, also with Adkins), Stolen (2012), Gone (2012), or perhaps a similar movie of this sort that we made up, Plucked. Some of which may include Liam Neeson, but all pretty much include a kidnapped young person that a man of action must retrieve. Hey, it was 2020 and that was the thing - as were very clear Trumpian references in some of the dialogue. Nero even works from home - very 2020.

But, plotwise, a very close parallel is Acceleration (2019). There, Natalie Burn had to drive around and do "action assignments" because Dolph was telling her to. Here, Scott Adkins must do the same because Mario Van Peebles was telling him to. We actually wouldn't recommend a double-bill of Acceleration and Seized because they're so darn similar. It would be like watching a three-hour version of the same thing.

Mario Van Peebles wears a pretty fantastic hat and his charismatic performance goes a long way, as it usually does. He's a solid foil for Adkins and they pit well against each other. In a big budget Hollywood movie, Dennis Hopper would have, could have, and should have played this role. But as Van Peebles fans we were certainly happy.

Adkins, of course, is no slouch, and in the nightclub scene we get a glimpse of what a John Wick sequel might look like if Adkins played Wick (as opposed to Killa). He's referred to as "The Best" - a classic cliche we all love - and watching him take down baddies is a joy. It was also nice to see him back in Mexico, but this time in a far better film than El Gringo (2012). He even gets his own Mel Gibson Ransom (1996) moment as he demands Mzamo give him back his son.

It's all over quite briskly at the 82-minute mark, as it should be. The audience is never even remotely close to being bored, and the photography is crisp and clear, with everything visible and vibrant.

For another Adkins/Florentine winner - we should all be thankful that they're working so well together still - be sure to check out Seized.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

10/15/2024

Prepare To Die (2024)

 


Prepare To Die (2024)- * * *

Dirtected by: Jose Montesinos

Starring: Ryan Padilla, Craig Ng, Zhan Wang, Brylee Hsu, Andrew Pinon, Quinton "Rampage" Jackson, Paula Rae Taylor, Rylan Williams, Michael Madsen, and Lorenzo Lamas




When Diego Padilla (Ryan Padilla) was just a young tot, the diabolical "Ruler of the Town" - you know the type - Blaine Richtefield (Lamas) one day just showed up on his family's land. Richtefield claimed he needed it so he could create a "beef farm". Said beef farm was so important to Richtefield to farm beef, he killed Padilla's parents. The goons were about to kill Diego as well, but with the help of Richtefield's sympathetic driver Silas (Wang), he escaped. Silas, being Chinese and all, sent Diego to live with his relatives in China. He figured it's going to take that amount of distance to keep him safe from the clutches of Richtefield. While in China, Diego trains in Martial Arts for ten years with Bingwen (Ng) and Xin Yi (Hsu), Silas's kin.




However, after those ten years, Diego figures that's enough time to then return to the States (or is it Mexico?) to get his revenge on Richtefield. Along the way he assembles a team of other people who also have been wronged by Richtefield: William Freeman (Williams), Blanca (Taylor), and James Swiftwater (Pinon). Each has their own skill set, i.e., Blanca is good with knives, Swiftwater has six-shooters, etc. Even though Richtefield has expanded his evil empire to include drugs and prostitution, and has a pimp/sidekick named Ryan Fruitwood (Jackson), Sheriff Hansen (Madsen) just looks the other way. Will our heroes finally take down the nefarious Blaine Richtefield? PREPARE to watch Tubi today!




Ryan Fruitwood. James Swiftwater. Blaine Richtefield. They're ALL HERE! Thanks to the genius character naming by writers Jose Montesinos (also the director) and Jacob David Smith, Prepare to Die consistenly holds the viewers' interest, because people in the movie are always saying these colorful names.




That being said, Prepare to Die is a fairly loving throwback to the 80's/90's-style "assemble a team and beat the bad guy"-type of action film. It doesn't offer anything particularly new to the mix - unless you count go-for-broke character names - but, then again, if you were seeking shocking and startling cinematic originality, you wouldn't be watching Prepare to Die in the first place. The fact that fan favorites Lorenzo Lamas and Michael Madsen are here - together for the first time - is reason enough to watch the film. Lamas plays the dastardly Richtefield (they say that name A LOT in the movie, so get ready for that) with what you might call "awkward aplomb" - he seems at ease, but not really. It's hard to explain. You just have to watch PTD to see what we mean. He looks like a cross between Richard Moll and Neal McDonough in the film. When he and his goons originally killed Diego's parents, he had gray hair. How, after ten years, did Diego know Richtefield wouldn't just die of natural causes? I guess it's just a chance he had to take.




As for our old buddy Mike Madsen...well, let's just say that it's a good thing that Tubi offers subtitles on all its films. It may not be one of his more coherent or "caring" performances, but it doesn't matter. Madsen is always entertaining to watch and this is no exception. Rampage doesn't do a heck of a lot here - his role is slightly bigger than in Acceleration (2019), but not by much. Our main hero, Ryan Padilla as Diego Padilla, is like an angrier Justin Long.




Curiously, there's a lot of unnecessarily repetitive dialogue throughout the film. For example, Diego at one point mentions "money I saved from working" - as if there was another income source he wanted to make sure the audience wasn't considering. Or, at a scene where the Freeman character is playing pool, he says something like, "No one can beat me at pool". We as the audience can see you're playing pool. The second half of that sentence is not needed.




There are other examples of repetition as well - there are multiple scenes of people saying they're afraid to go up against Richtefield, then eventually agreeing to. If the film had less repetition, and instead maybe a few more beat-em-up/shooting scenes, we might have a bit more of a winner on our hands. Repetition is especially noticeable in a made-for-Tubi movie, because we have to sit through six commercials for Mint Mobile just to get to the next scene. So to cover ground we've already covered seems even more superfluous than usual.




However, the filmmakers clearly "get it" - they wanted to make an old-school actioner and they did. We give all due credit and kudos to them for that. We can look past some of the silly-looking CGI (there's not much of it), because it's 2024 and apparently that's the way it is now. We don't have much choice, apparently. So, for the Madsen & Lamas factor, and to get a look behind the curtain of evil beef farms, Prepare to Die is worth a watch.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty