The Last Riders (1992)

The Last Riders (1992)- *1\2

Directed by: Joesph Merhi

Starring: Erik Estrada, William Smith, Minnie Madden, Mindy Martin, Mimi Lesseos, and Kathrin Middleton













Johnny Wilson (Estrada) is a member of the Slavers biker gang, but after a botched escapade involving money and drugs, some people die, including a cop. After this, Johnny decides he’s had enough, and departs the Slavers for good. Or so he thinks. He ends up in a dusty ol’ Nevada town, working as a mechanic with his old friend Hammer (Smith). He soon meets a woman, Anna (Middleton) and her young daughter, Sammi (Mindy Martin), and he begins to rebuild his life. 

But his past soon comes back to haunt him, as the Slavers feel he betrayed them, and they’re out for his blood. And law enforcement feel similarly, blaming Johnny for the death of the law enforcement officer. Now, as both sides of the law are gunning for him, Johnny must make his final stand. Will he truly be one of the...LAST RIDERS?

We felt that The Last Riders was a rare misstep for the normally-solid PM. It has a weirdly disjointed feel, with a lot of airy, empty space when there should be more forward drive. It essentially becomes a romantic drama at one point, which wouldn’t be so bad, but the filmmakers somehow managed to screw up what should have been a slam-dunk ending. 

We won’t give away any spoilers, we’ll just say it’s edited and paced...unusually, and where there should have been full-throttle revenge, it lacks a powerful momentum. In our world, botching what should have been an appropriate revenge is an inexcusable mistake. As much as it saddens us, we can’t give The Last Riders a very high rating. We love Merhi, Randall and PM, and we love Smith, Lesseos and  Estrada, but something went awry here. It’s unfortunate.

The movie is truly Mimi Lesseos at her best. She has a great look, and as a female wrestler (which she also portrayed in the same year’s Pushed To The Limit) she gets to show off some of her moves both in and out of the ring. She’s only in the first part of the movie, unfortunately, and after she departs, the movie suffers immensely. 

The whole “romance” sub-plot is pretty typical: Middleton plays your classic “annoying woman” who doesn’t get along with Estrada, and they butt heads over disputes like food, but, after a whirlwind courtship, they end up marrying after only knowing each other a few days (?). 

But Sammi, the young tot of a daughter, basically steals the movie. She’s a realistic-looking child, not an overly-cute “movie kid”. She has a Bart Simpson shirt, pajamas that say “KID” on them, and other classic early-90’s clothing. Her facial expressions and line deliveries are priceless.  It’s casting decisions like this (and Lesseos) that make you think...Okay, this movie isn’t bad, but it’s not great, either. But the lame ending puts a deciding nail into this coffin of a movie.

While there is the time-honored barfight, the movie could have used some more action in the middle instead of romance. Or just more of a threat from the Slavers. Slowing the pace even more are two live performances from an all-female band called The Sheilas (which seems to be misspelled in the end credits). Their songs are catchy and professional-sounding, but why are we spending so much time with them? They add nothing to the plot and we don’t know them personally. 

Adding to the confusion, Hammer’s wife in the movie is named Sheila (Madden), but she’s NOT in the band, but they keyboard player looks exactly like Mimi Lesseos, who’s not in the band either. Of the non-Sheilas music, the opening song is very Cameo-like, and William Smith’s voice, which sounds like he gargles with razor blades, is like sweet music to our ears, anyway.

As a biker, perhaps it was thought that Estrada could make an easy job transition from CHiPS to SLAVERS. But regardless, The Last Riders is a disappointment.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Streets Of Rage (1994)

Streets Of Rage (1994)-* *

Directed by: Richard Elfman

Starring: Mimi Lesseos, Ira Gold, Christopher Cass, Oliver Page, and Gokor Chivichyan














Melody Sails (Lesseos) is a strong, independent woman of the nineties. She is working as a fact-checker for a newspaper in the L.A. area, but hopes to be a reporter. In her quest to get a great scoop so she can impress her editor, Harrison (Tony Gibson) and join the official roster of the newspaper, she begins interviewing street kids and runaways. She goes to skid row, getting down and dirty at halfway houses and seedy pizza joints where these ragamuffins hang out. In the course of her investigation, she meets a 12-year-old panhandler named Steven (Gold) and an older teen named Candy (Juli James). They end up staying at her house and they become close. Because she is a former Special Forces Commando, this high-kicking newsgal can protect them, and herself.

 But interrupting all this is a malevolent presence on the streets. A diabolical pimp with a British accent named Lunar (Page) is killing prostitutes all over town and people are scared. He just sits in his limo and lets his goons do all the dirty work, most notably Gokor (Chivichyan). Meanwhile, Melody is being courted by a number of men, including a cop, a Texas art collector, and a co-worker at her newspaper. Which one will she choose? Is one of them secretly a connection to the diabolical Lunar? What will happen to her beloved street urchins?

Yes, Street of Rage does have a very cheap video look. Yes, it has the "production values" of a family home movie. Yes, that extends to the sound, where you constantly hear cars going by in the background. Yes, almost everything about it is hugely amateurish, especially most of the acting. But as I always say, stop being so critical. You could tell Lesseos (who wore a lot of different hats on the production) was trying. She got this movie out there. You didn't. Stop being such a hater. Lesseos has a likable personality and presence, and she also has some cool moves, even if they are awkwardly choreographed at times. She resembles a more athletic Anjelica Huston. It would be awesome if she and Cynthia Rothrock had a long, intense fight scene in a movie. Maybe that will happen someday.

But the movie just gets everything off on the wrong foot because of the title. For most people, Streets of Rage is one thing and CAN only be one thing. The legendary Genesis game. The game came out in 1991, so here they have no excuse. There's a lot more rage on the streets with Axel, Adam, and, most relevantly, Blaze, than there is here.

Taking a cue from movies of an earlier vintage, the music score is drenched in plenty of smooth sax. Take that, Fortune Dane (1986). Pleasantly, the film ends on a freeze frame, and behind the credits are clips from some of the scenes we just saw. Speaking of credits, a special thanks went out to Joseph Merhi, and it's easy to see why.

As far as Gokor is concerned, perhaps they should have given his character a different name, because it sounds like everyone is calling him "Go-Kart". An interesting name for a baddie, to be sure.

So for Z-grade martial arts action, check in with the good-natured Lesseos...but don't get on her bad side.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Final Impact (1992)

Final Impact (1992)-* * *

Directed By: Joseph Merhi & Stephen Smoke

Starring: Lorenzo Lamas, Kathleen Kinmont, Mimi Lesseos, Michael Worth, and Gary Daniels










In the late 80’s and early 90’s, video store shelves were clogged with Punchfighting, shootfighting, kickfighting, legfighting, armfighting, and ???-fighting movies. These macho meathead fests featured oiled-up men in singlets mindlessly pounding each other. We don’t mean to “bash” these flicks, but the fact is they came in the wake of successes like Bloodsport (1988) and Kickboxer (1989). I proudly own most of them. Despite their knockoff status, they are clearly trying and mostly succeeding in pure entertainment value. Also most of the fighters in the movies are skilled martial artists and it is a pleasure to watch them fight.

Sure, everyone knows the big names in the beat-em ups such as Van Damme and Seagal. But without the direct-to-video B market for these films we wouldn’t have a new class of action star. Where would we be without William Zabka, Don “The Dragon” Wilson, Jeff Speakman, Matthias Hues, and Gary Daniels? The answer: NOWHERE!

This time around, Lamas plays jaded, tequila-swilling ex-fighter Nick Taylor who now promotes underground kick-fighting matches. When young Turk Danny Davis (Worth) a fresh-faced rookie fighter comes into Taylor’s world, Taylor sees his potential as a top-kicker and trains him to be the best and be a kick-fighting champion in Las Vegas. But first he has to defeat the spoiled Johnny Cage-like Hollywood fighter Jake.




On his way up to the top he has to fight a young Gary Daniels. Nick has continuous flashbacks to his defeat in the ring years ago at the hands of the dastardly Jake. Now he and Danny have to get even. Also there is the prerequisite street fight in a place called the “Neon Graveyard”.

One of the funniest parts of the movie is during one of Nick’s flashbacks. In the grand tradition of Ian Borger and fan-favorite Ron Marchini, Lamas bellows in slow mention “Nooooooooooo!!!” But Worth as Danny Davis gets the best line of the movie when in an argument with Nick he retorts: “If I’m so predictable, how come I’m the light-heavyweight champ of Ohio?!” Nick feels the burn of this nonsensical zinger.

If there was no Lamas, There would be no movie. But the real star of the show are Lorenzo’s outfits: He wears a leather vest with no shirt for most of the movie, and it’s about 40 minutes in until we see our first shirt.

Make an “Impact”ful statement by buying this classic tonight!



Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett