Mercenary Fighters (1988)

Mercenary Fighters (1988)- * *

Directed by: Riki Shelach Nissimoff

Starring: Reb Brown, Peter Fonda, James Mitchum, Ron O' Neal, and Robert DoQui









When some tribesmen in an African village stage an insurrection, the President of Africa (yeah, that’s the ticket…) calls in some foreign White Devils to quell the rebellion, presumably to distance himself from all the local killing and destruction. Vietnam vets T.J. Christian (Brown) and Cliff Taylor (O’Neal), along with Wilson (Mitchum) and some other guy are under the command of Virelli (Fonda), also a ‘Nam veteran. However, as some of our “Mercenary Fighters” come to know the people of the land they’re now in, alliances and allegiances change. Will they Fight to the finish?

We can safely say that Mercenary Fighters is…something you’d find in a video store. At least back in the golden age. Its overall mediocrity ensures it being standard shelf-filler, or, perhaps more accurately, “Cannon fodder” (heh heh. Has anyone ever used that one before?) 

Nevertheless, the movie contains all the standard stuff we’ve come to depend on: explosions, exploding huts, exploding guard towers, guard tower falls, jungles or jungle-like locations, and plenty of shooting. Peter Fonda has a big gun that is a one-shot hut blower-upper, and most of the war violence occurs during the final battle. It is also at this climactic moment that we finally get to hear Reb Brown’s time-honored “Reb-el” yell. He even gets so deep into his screaming, he does practically a whole dialogue scene in a helicopter, let’s just say, not using his indoor voice.

While Reb’s shoutings were apparently such a selling point in the 80’s that he’s even seen screaming on the front cover of the VHS (apparently by the late eighties they had really caught on), Peter Fonda’s silly hair is NOT front and center on the box art. It’s obscured by a mysterious hat. His long, scraggly locks seen in the film seem to be a leftover from his more hippie-ish acting roles, but on a dime about halfway through this film, he snaps into a tough commander role, as if he woke up midway through the production and realized he was supposed to be tough this time around.

Even though Mercenary Fighters on the whole is fairly middling, no one can accuse it of shortchanging us of our favorite stars. Besides Fonda and Brown, we also have Ron O’Neal – even though the credits misspell his name as “O’Neil” – and yet another fan favorite, Jim Mitchum. Mitchum here is classic Mitchum. He wears a shirt that says “Bad Boy”, when he’s not wearing a Hawaiian shirt, and is never seen without his Walkman. If it was somehow possible to not shave for 25 years and not grow a full beard, that’s how his face looks. Surprisingly, his mellow performance would indicate he might not care too much about the proceedings.

On the whole, we’ve never cared too much for what we call “Africa Slogs”, and this is certainly one. Truly this movie is no Red Scorpion (1988), the exception that proves the rule. Despite getting to see some of our favorite actors all together at once, and some decent war violence, somehow, Mercenary Fighters left us unsatisfied.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Also check out a write-up from our buddy, DTVC!

Diplomatic Immunity (1991)

Diplomatic Immunity (1991)-* * *

Directed by: Peter Maris

Starring: Bruce Boxleitner, Billy Drago, Robert Miano, Robert Forster, Sharon Case, Ken Foree, Meg Foster, Fabiana Udenio, Christoper Neame, Robert DoQui, and Matthias Hues











Cole Hickel (Boxleitner) is a Vietnam vet and career Marine. He has a beautiful daughter, Ellen (Case) who gets mixed up with a murdering psychopath obsessed with macabre art, naturally named Klaus (Bresnahan). When Klaus kills Ellen, Cole is enraged and wants revenge. This normally would be easy, thanks to Hickel’s military training, but the worm-like Klaus is hiding behind his “Diplomatic Immunity” privileges and he flees to Paraguay where his mother, Gerta (Foster) is some kind of big shot. After being told not to go to Paraguay by government agent Stonebridge (Forster), Hickel disobeys and goes there (and goes rogue). Once in Paraguay, he meets up with his contact, Cowboy (Drago) and loads up on weapons. Now protecting Teresa (Udenio) from the baddies, which include Klaus’ bodyguard Gephardt (Hues), Hickel must use all his wits to get justice for his daughter and make it back to the U.S. alive. Can he do it?

This is the best Peter Maris movie we’ve seen to date. We were a bit hesitant going in, as we weren’t all that crazy about his past work that we’d seen, but we’re glad we did. Diplomatic Immunity is like a better version of his Ministry of Vengeance (1989). Plus, look at the amazing cast he assembled for this one! It truly is The Expendables of early-90’s revenge movies with Bruce Boxleitner. Speaking of Boxleitner, we thought it was good casting putting him in the role of Cole. It could have been some meathead, but he’s actually a good actor. We noticed Matt McColm among the stunt players, they could have used him. But they went with a more sober and believable direction. My only question is, are Bruce Boxleitner and Barry Bostwick two different people? Can anyone confirm this? Have you ever seen them in the same place at the same time?

Backing up Cole Hickel - which is kind of an unnecessarily funny-sounding name - is a great cast, and we didn’t even mention Robert Miano and Ken Foree, who have small, but important parts. That’s the thing about all-star casts, talented actors don’t get enough time in the sun. For instance, Meg Foster deserved more. As did fan favorite Matthias Hues. But for a 90-minute running time, you have to concentrate on the plot and not get into diversions. Because the plot of 'Immunity is about as simple as it gets - guy wants revenge - Maris laudably keeps things on track, but such a flimsy plot just barely makes a 90-minute movie.

It seems this movie capitalized on the public’s interest for the concept of Diplomatic Immunity, because, for 1991, we presume people were just becoming aware of this term. This was still a relatively new thing in the minds of the public, so Maris was right there with a movie to exploit that interest. It does seem wildly unfair that Diplomatic Immunity could protect any old scumbag murderer who gets the opportunity  to say “I get to go home now scot-free, I plead Diplomatic Immunity, see ya.” Apparently you can be a murderer and get to invoke this privilege. So enter Cole Hickel and his rage that Klaus took his beloved daughter. So that’s pretty much the idea.

Maris should also be applauded for daring to put Billy Drago in a rare (and possibly his ONLY) good-guy role. Diplomatic Immunity is a solid, 80’s-style movie that’s worth seeing. Is it more than a one-time watch? Probably not, but it’s a worthwhile one. If you see it somewhere, pick it up.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Short Fuse (1986)

 Short Fuse (1986)-* * *

AKA: Good To Go

Directed by: Blaine Novak

Starring: Art Garfunkel, Harris Yulin, Robert DoQui, and Richard Brooks









In Washington, D.C. in the 1980’s, Go-Go music was huge. Go-Go is an urban cross between funk, R&B, soul and dance music with extended songs meant for the largely African-American audiences to dance the night away to. Some of the most famous practitioners of this genre of music include Trouble Funk, Redd & The Boys, and Chuck Brown and the Soul Searchers. Max (DoQui) is a music impresario and label head who is trying to make this music go global and has a large record deal in the works for Redd & The Boys.  

Spoiling this dream, a rape and murder occurs outside a club that caters to the music, called, you guessed it, The Go-Go. Or did it? Trying to get to the truth, alcoholic newspaper reporter S.D. Blass (Garfunkel) calls Chief Harrigan of the local police precinct. Harrigan leads Blass to believe Chemist (Brooks) was involved in the crime. But along the way, Blass befriends Chemist’s little brother Beats (Daughtry) and begins to question Harrigan and his motivations. After a lot of chaos and confusion, Blass begins to sort things out - but he’s going to have to do it fast before a race riot occurs in D.C. Can he do it?

Please read in a gravelly, portentous, gravely serious Don LaFontaine-like movie trailer announcer voice: Art Garfunkel. Has a: SHORT FUSE. Coming this summer. When we think of actors that could be chosen for the lead role in a movie entitled Short Fuse, names like Clint Eastwood, Charles Bronson or Jason Statham come to mind. But for some reason yet to be fathomed by mankind, they chose noted badass Art Garfunkel for the role. And true to form, in this movie he’s such a wet noodle that he makes Toby from The Office look like The Ultimate Warrior. But in all fairness, this movie was originally titled Good To Go (and characters do say that a lot and there’s a song of the same name on the soundtrack as well).  Adding weirdness to inappropriateness, the main thrust of this movie is urban, street-level crime, in the era of boomboxes, graffiti and Kangol hats. Again...Art Garfunkel? But seriously, we could see what they were thinking because “Bridge Over Troubled Water” has some fresh beats.

And if they were so gung-ho for Garfunkel, why hire Harris Yulin as the only other White guy in the cast? They look very, very similar. So much so it’s hard to tell them apart in some scenes. But the tell is Garfunkel’s bizarre combover. It makes Donald Trump’s look positively normal by comparison. Plus the movie has a lot of product placement for Pepsi. It’s practically a 90-minute commercial for Pepsi. But it’s hard to imagine the Pepsi people being very happy that a movie about a drug-fuelled rape and murder with a bunch of shootouts and car crashes is so tied in with their product.  That observation aside, by far the best thing about Short Fuse is not, as you might expect, the length of the fuse of one Arthur Ira Garfunkel. It’s the music!

In all seriousness, the soundtrack and the live performances are uniformly excellent. All the bands mentioned above are excellent, both musically and from a showmanship perspective. We really were dancing in our seats! As a concert film documenting the Go-Go phenomenon, Short Fuse is actually an important “Art”-ifact. Robert DoQui, who was in Diplomatic Immunity (1991), and resembles Richard Roundtree but is an accomplished actor in his own right, is always worth seeing, as is future Law & Order star Richard Brooks, who also appeared in Shakedown (1988). Short Fuse is listed in some sources as a “concert drama” and seems to be little-seen, even though it was released on the Vidmark label. But the cast, as well as the musical performances keep it from ever getting boring.

Witness Art put the “funk” in “Garfunkel” and watch this oddity today!

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett