Overkill (1987)

Overkill (1987)- * *1\2

Directed by: Ulli Lommel

Starring: Steve Rally and John Nishio


"Different Worlds. Different  Weapons. One War."










Mickey “Mike” Delano (Rally) is clearly a man who wishes his name wasn’t Mickey. He’s also an L.A. Cop On the Edge. Putting him further on the edge than ever before is the recent influx of Yakuza in Little Tokyo. Mickey Mike makes it his personal mission to take down the gangsters that are ruining his beloved city and state. Towards this end, he teams up with Japanese-American cop Akashi (Nishio). Apparently Akashi has his own, more personal reasons for wanting to wipe out the criminals that are running wild in the city. Will Mickey Mike and the funky bunch be able to accomplish their mission? Find out today!

Not to be confused with Overkill (1996), in this particular Overkill, there’s nary a Jack Hazard in sight. Presumably that would count in the movie’s favor, but what we do have is one Steve Rally, of Maximum Breakout (1991) fame. Shirts, but in particular, sleeves, must feel like the equivalent of fiberglass insulation to his skin. When he’s not busy taking off his Powerhouse Gym tanktop, he’s shirtlessly fighting the baddies. 

But he has a lot of shirtless competition, as many shameless men go about their daily business unencumbered by the onerous burden of having a thin layer of cloth on their torso. Imagine a man who finds a half-shirt too confining, multiply awesomex10, add most of the leftover DNA of Freddie Mercury, and you have Steve Rally.  Plus he predates Matthew McConaughey by many years, and his mustache is much cooler.

Clearly director Ulli Lommel, whose name is not a palindrome no matter how hard you try to make it one, wanted to make “Shirts vs. Skins: The Movie”, but couldn’t, as there were no shirts,  so he settled on making a cop movie. Overkill is yet another “White boy in a world of dangerous Asians” movie much like its brethren Year of the Dragon (1985), Massacre (1985), or Showdown In Little Tokyo (1991). But Lommel’s movie is like the distant stepchild to these, even the equally low-budget Massacre. It’s not entirely dissimilar from Samurai Cop (1989), but we don’t want to sing the praises of Overkill too loudly, it’s not really in that classic’s league. 

The main problem is that there are a ton of weird close-ups, and the movie is incoherent because it looks like it was edited with a bandsaw. Plus it could have used a co-star of the caliber of Bolo Yeung or George Chung. Or even a White guy pretending to be Asian, like Robert Z’Dar as “Yamashita” in Samurai Cop, would have helped a lot.

Nevertheless, Mike Delano - or perhaps even Steve Rally himself - is livin’ the dream. He gets to be a rogue cop and defy his WYC (White Yelling Chief), live in a nice house with a hot babe as a girlfriend, and eat sushi while he sits in his hot tub or engages in any other activity that gives him a pretext to be shirtless. Which leads up to an inexplicable (plotwise) scene where Delano indulges in his true calling. We won’t spoil it for you, but you’ll definitely know what we’re talking about when you see it. 1987, the year of this movie’s release, was a big year for Miami Vice-mania and it shows here. You even see a little kid wearing a Miami Vice shirt, in the same scene where Delano wears a white sportcoat with the sleeves rolled up. Coincidence?

In the end, Overkill does have some highly ridiculous moments that make it worth watching, but even at 80 minutes, the movie drags at times. It’s kind of a 50-50 deal.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Kindergarten "Ninja" (1994)

 Kindergarten "Ninja" (1994)- * * *1\2

Directed by: Anthony Chan

Starring: Dwight Clark, Juan Chapa, Vinny Cerrato and George Chung





  “Later, dude.”




 Blade Steel (Clark) is a man who lives up to his awesome name. A football star for the San Francisco “Gold Rush”, he spends his time being an unrepentant womanizer and alcoholic. But he’s living large, so no one seems to mind. That is, until he gets arrested on a DWI beef. Naturally, we then cut to heaven...yes, the heaven, where Charlie Chaplin and Elvis are just hanging around doing what they do. Apparently, in order for a Martial Artist named Bruce (surely not meant to make you think of anyone famous) to become an official angel, he must help a person in need. And that person is...you guessed it, a starving child in Africa. NO, of course it’s Blade Steel. 

Meanwhile, Steel becomes a substitute teacher of sorts as part of his community service for his DWI. Because the tots are obsessed with the then-current game Street Fighter II, he decides to teach them all Martial Arts. But first he needs to learn it himself, so he takes classes with a blind master, named Master Chosen One (Chung). As if that wasn’t enough, evil, Tony Montana-like drug-dealing bigshot Hector Machete (Chapa) is using the community center where Steel and the children are to run his drug operations. 

The new drug on the street is Buzz, imported from China, and Machete isn’t happy that the Master, and Blade, are cleaning up the town of San Leandro, CA. So he sends his army of henchmen, which are mostly children, to settle the situation, and local Detective Antonelli (Cerrato) is trying to make sense of it all. What will happen to the...KINDERGARTEN “NINJA”?

All we can say is...wow. Like all the best films in cinema history, Kindergarten “Ninja” is a co-production between D.A.R.E. and America’s Best Karate. The gold that this unlikely duo produced is exactly what you might expect. The results speak for themselves. The first thing you may notice about this movie is the title, and the fact that the word ninja is in quotes. Try to think of another movie title where one of the words is in quotes. This should give you some indication of the insane originality (or original insanity) of this oddball outing. 

Somewhere in the netherworld between a classroom educational film, a home movie, and a professional production lies Kindergarten “Ninja”. Thankfully there are plenty of intentional and unintentional laughs along the way, and the sheer amazement you will feel that not only was this made, but distributed around the world, will sustain you through its (barely) 80 minute running time.

It’s hard to describe in words what the tone and overall feeling of this movie is, but let’s just say “nonsensical” is an understatement. Thankfully, Dwight Clark is on board. The man is truly a powerhouse. He can sing, dance, do Martial Arts, play football, and, most notably, act. Scenes are shot at his own restaurant, Clark’s By The Bay. (The main scene there is truly a show-stopper). Not to be outdone, the great George Chung plays Master Chosen One. 

We absolutely loved his Hawkeye (1988), and Kindergarten “Ninja” just reinforces our fandom. Chapa as Machete is also worth noting, but all the non-actors here steal the show. Especially the kids. Where are they today? And the man who introduces the movie, San Leandro Police Chief Robert Maginnis, what does he think today of the movie? Has he ever seen it?

The vast majority of the film’s running time is taken up with endless training sequences. Though the musical stylings of one Joel McKellar are inspired by Over the Top (1987), the amount of time spent on watching Dwight Clark do ab crunches with George Chung is, well...over the top. But if you want to be a master playboy like Blade Steel, just learn from his classic pickup lines. His ace in the hole seems to be “Do you like French fries?” so feel free to try that one. 

Despite the film’s unusual nature, it still ends with the time-honored warehouse fight (though we’ve never seen one quite like this), and, to give you a sense of the level of intelligence at work, the mayor of the town is named, and we quote, Mayor Crookalini.

We guarantee you’ve never seen a movie like Kindergarten “Ninja” before. The only question is, do you want to? It can be found dirt cheap most places it is sold. If you have a sense of humor and a taste for the odd, we give it a solid recommendation.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett