Crime Lords (1991)

 

Crime Lords (1991)- * * *

Directed by: Wayne Crawford

Starring: Wayne Crawford, Martin Hewitt, James Hong, Susan Byun, and Ted Le Plat

L.A. Cops Elmo Lagrange (Crawford) and Peter Russo (Hewitt) are partners, but also an Odd Couple of sorts. Lagrange is a crabby curmudgeon and perhaps not the best physical specimen on the force. Russo is young, hip, idealistic, and happenin' - his stylish mullet tells that tale. On the trail of some CRIME LORDS, the two men fly to Hong Kong. So now they're an Odd Couple, Cops On the Edge and now Fish out of Water. Getting mixed up with Ling (Hong) and Jennifer Monahan (Byun) lead them to the ultimate confrontation. But will they survive their Hong Kong escapade?



At the time of this writing, there are almost 1,300 reviews on this site. So perhaps it makes sense that then, and only then, would we be getting to Wayne Crawford. We have that luxury now, in 2024, but video store patrons in the early 90's would likely not have rented 1,300 movies before they got to Crawford. Consequently, it seems, not a heck of a lot of people discovered the charms (?) of Wayne Crawford.


Crawford looks like a cross between Sam Waterston and Leo Rossi. He claims to have a "spare tire", and is unshaven and cynical. His Comeuppance-relevant credits include White Ghost (1988) and L.A.P.D.: To Protect and to Serve (2001). His partner in 'Crime is Martin Hewitt, known for his run of Erotic thrillers in the 90's. There is a scene, presumably played for laughs, where he and Crawford get into a fight while wearing only their underwear. Perhaps this served as a good training ground for what he did later on.


Buddy cop movies were all the rage at the time, and Lethal Weapon (1987), Red Heat (1988), and Action Jackson (1988) ruled the video stores of the day. This seems to be the inspiration for Crime Lords. Throw in a WYC, Captain John Strauss (Le Plat), some silly dialogue, wacky situations, but also some fish-out-of-water cop action in Hong Kong, and there you have it. Most, if not all, of the cliches that you would expect to see in this sort of material are indeed present and accounted for. That's not a bad thing.


The main drawback to Crime Lords is its pacing issues, which are very noticeable throughout. But it was nice to see those old one-color computers with their dot matrix printers, and other nostalgic items on display. Plus there was a scene with a flicked cigarette that showed some cinematic ingenuity on Crawford's part (he also directed the film).


Clearly the Elmo Lagrange character was near and dear to his heart, because he returned in American Cop (1995). In the end, however, Crime Lords isn't exactly must-see viewing, but it's entertaining enough for what it is. If you've seen every other buddy cop movie ever made and are looking for another one, there's always Crime Lords.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Terminator Woman (1993)

Terminator Woman (1993)- * * *

Directed by: Michel Quissi

Starring: Karen Sheperd, Jerry Trimble, Michel Quissi, Ashley Hayden, and Ted Le Pat













Sgt. Jay Handlin (Trimble) and Sgt. Julie Parish (Sheperd) are cops with an ongoing rivalry about who is the better Martial Artist - but could there be some sparks flying in the romantic department as well? In the midst of trying to figure these things out, the pair travel to Africa of all places to try and bring down crime lord Alex Gatelee (Qissi). 

Consequently, they get into a ton of fights and face some other trials and tribulations - Julie is kidnapped, Jay has to reject the advances of Gatelee associate Myra Bolo (Hayden), and so forth. After enlisting the help of some locals, their Martial Arts abilities are truly put to the test when they face the ultimate showdown - Gatelee himself, of course. Will Jay be Handlin business? Find out today...?

Terminator Woman, not to be confused with Lady Terminator (1989), is professionally-shot and competently made - could it be a coincidence that this was not one of Trimble’s Roger Corman-produced actioners? That being said, the pacing is off and things get a bit dull at times. If about 10 minutes were lopped off, this whole outing might have a bit more verve to it. 

But the leads are all top-notch: You’ve got fan-favorite Trimble, who, in the most complimentary sense, resembles a more meatheady Emilio Estevez, and his trademark raspy voice is instantly recognizable. Then you’ve got fellow fan-favorite Sheperd, an enjoyable screen presence whose Martial Arts skill is excellent and wonderfully captured here. Finally, there’s Qissi, who also directed the movie, who very convincingly plays the baddie. So those are the movie’s strengths and weaknesses for you, and they fight it out - like everyone else on screen - throughout the running time.

Generally speaking, we don’t really care for ‘Africa Slogs’, as we call them, but this one is tolerable, thanks mainly to the aforementioned leads. The Trimble/Sheperd team up was an inspired choice, and it might remind you of similar pairings, such as Richard Norton and Cynthia Rothrock in the Rage and Honor diptych, or Steven Vincent Leigh and Sophia Crawford in Sword of Honor (1996). If nothing else, the movie as a whole plays to the strengths of the leads, and there are plenty of fights - as well as some good-natured stupidity - to prove that.

The whole thing is very 90’s - just witness the scenes at the Backlash club for proof. Maybe it’s an Africa thing, or maybe it’s an action movie thing, but it’s hard to imagine a dance club in the U.S. being named “Backlash”. It’s a bit too angry for us. 

Judging by the large “TW” logo on the U.S. VHS box art, perhaps the filmmakers were attempting a bit of branding: this is the one and only TW, and in their ideal world, people would ask each other around the water cooler, “have you seen the latest TW movie? I did, and it was awesome.” Latest, because surely more TW’s were planned. As it stands, presumably Sheperd is the TW, but the movie isn’t solely about her and her quest. Trimble is an equal part, and they didn’t call the movie “Terminator Man” - though, to be fair, Steve Railsback is the true Termination Man. Schwarzenegger ranks somewhere in there too, I’m sure.

In the midst of all the action, Trimble finds time to do a spontaneous shirtless Martial Arts workout/display alone in his hotel room whilst wearing tight jeans. The only outfit a 90’s action star needs.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Also check out write-ups from our buddies, DTVC and The Video Vacuum!

To The Death (1993)

To The Death (1993)-* *

Directed by: Darrell Roodt

Starring: John Barrett, Michael Quissi, Claudia Udy, Michelle Bestbier, Robert Whitehead, and Ted Le Plat












In this REAL sequel to American Kickboxer 1 (1990), “Quinn” (Barrett) retires from Punchfighting and lives a peaceful life with his beloved wife Carol (Udy). “Denard” (Qissi) is seemingly obsessed with taking on Quinn in one last match (don’t worry, we’re going to explain why the names are in quotes later in the review). Quinn refuses to fight, which upsets maniacal millionaire Dominique Le Braque (Whitehead), who stages fights.  It angers him so much, he kills Quinn’s wife. Now distraught, Quinn hits the skids, living in a seedy motel and drinking himself to death. Preying on Quinn’s new vulnerability, Dominique invites Quinn to live at his palatial estate and train to get back into shape so he can fight and win a lot of money. Quinn agrees, not knowing they are Punchfighting matches...wait for it...TO THE DEATH! (In a slight twist on that tale, you don’t actually FIGHT to the death, if you lose the match, an evil ref just comes in and shoots you in the face.) 

After a some plot padding, Quinn develops a relationship with Dominique’s wife Angelica (Bestbier), and the sinister Dominique doesn’t take very kindly to that. Will Quinn ever escape his clutches?  Or will Quinn don his craziest Punchfighting Pants and fight his way out?

About the names being in quotes above, confusingly, even though there were characters BJ Quinn and Jacques Denard in American Kickboxer 1, Here, for some unknown reason, Barrett here is Rick Quinn and Qissi (a different actor) is some other Denard. Why this happened, we don’t know. Maybe Cannon demanded it.

We like John Barrett, but this movie never really rises above decent. Whitehead as the over-the-top baddie is like some kind of cross between Raul Julia and Tim Curry. He chews the scenery well. Rather than give a thumbs up or thumbs down as to whether the fighter will live, he delicately throws a rose. Now we know where the producers of The Bachelor get their ideas. 

Le Braque even dresses in a Clockwork Orange-style getup. In another absurd device, the ring announcer is none other than a man in harlequin makeup reminiscent of The Joker (he even tells really bad jokes and tries to outdo Whitehead in the crazy sweepstakes). He’s truly one of the original Insane Clown Posse.

Willard the reporter who looks like Owen C. Wilson is back (Le Plat), but presumably it’s some OTHER Willard. Quinn trains for his Punchfighting matches in dress pants, but really, if you look objectively, the Punchfighting in this movie is not that great. Additionally, the plot suffers from all sorts of maladies, but mainly  pacing issues, and the script should have gone through a few more drafts - there’s a good movie in here somewhere but it’s buried in a few layers of crud.

One of the better aspects of this movie, as we’ve seen so many times before, is the title song. The rap by Edward Jordan is a lot of fun. But really, the main flaw here is that the original Jacques Denard did not return. He really brought a lot to the table in the first film.

If you’re just itching to see the continuation of the saga of Quinn, Denard and Willard, by all means, seek this movie out - but as an example of an entirely cohesive film or an example of a great Punchfighter....this sadly isn’t really it.

Also check out our buddy Direct To Video Connoisseur's review!

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

American Kickboxer 1 (1990)

American Kickboxer 1 (1990)-* * 1\2

Directed By: Frans Nel

Starring: John Barrett, Keith Vitali, Brad Morris, and Ted Le Plat













The first thing you'll notice about "American Kickboxer 1" is THE 1. How did they know when they made it, it would have a sequel...two years later? Talk about jumping the gun on a franchise! Maybe they were hoping to reach eight (to date) sequels like the "Bloodfist" series and wanted to show the world they were ahead of the curve. Anyway...



World kickboxing champ BJ Quinn (Barrett) accidentally kills Ken Harrigan outside the ring in a freak accident and is sold down the river in court by his conceited, evil rival Jacques Denard (Morris, in a career-defining performance). After getting out of jail after 10 months, he is banned from kickboxing in championship bouts. However, he does train his buddy Chad (Vitali) to take on Denard. All of this drama is being monitored by sassy journalist Willard (Le Plat). Will a grudge match ensue between Quinn and Denard? Who will be victorious?




The character of Jacques Denard is an all-time classic. He is French, flamboyant, and flamingly arrogant. He wears a tutu of tassels (!) in the ring. That alone is enough to knock your opponent over! At one of his many press conferences, he wears a bowtie and no shirt. He has lines shaven in his head and rides a motorcycle. He's the ultimate "Love to Hate Him" baddie. He actually eclipses previous jerk from American Shaolin: King of the Kickboxers II, Trevor Gottitall.



Interestingly, just as the movie High Risk (1995) has a character not-so-subtly mocking Jackie Chan, "American Kickboxer 1" presumably does the same to Jean-Claude Van Damme. We believe Denard is a direct slam on Van Damme. He is a Van Damme lookalike and soundalike, and another character says (the term) "Bloodsport has a negative connotation". As "Kickboxer" 1 is a Cannon film, as was Bloodsport (1988), it seems to be a sly reference. Perhaps someone in the production here worked with Van Damme, and this is their revenge.




A film highlight is the courtroom scene. Quinn's lawyer appears to be about ten years old (no wonder he lost the case). Actually, he resembles Peter Billingsley of Beverly Hills Brats (1989) fame. Denard takes the stand wearing sunglasses and playing with his brass knuckles. Is that allowed?

The play-by-play announcers at the kickboxing matches are funny. Is anyone listening to kickboxing on the radio? "There's a punch! Now a kick! Now a punch!"...etc...

Barrett of Shootfighter (1992) fame and a former associate of Chuck Norris, plays, by today's standards, an older punchfighter. He was born in 1952, and was a spry 40 when he took on Denard. Like Night of the Kickfighters'  Andy Bauman and Busted Up's (1986) Paul Coufos before him, he shows you don't have to be young to beat people up. Barrett's theme song "He's a Man", used during his training sequences, should have been used more, although I don't think we need convincing.



American Kickboxer 1 is a decent entry into the punch/kick/fist/fighting/meathead genre. It delivers all the standard stuff you are looking for and doesn't disappoint. It's worth watching for the Denard character alone.

If you must see "1" movie about kickboxing this week, see "American Kickboxer 1"!

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty