Karate Raider (1995)

Karate Raider (1995)- * * *

Directed by: Ron Marchini and Charlie Ordonez

Starring: Ron Marchini, Shelly Gaunt, Ivan Rogers, Joe Meyer, Burt Ward, and Joe Estevez








“There’s a bonus for anyone who can touch my face.” - Pike



 Jake Turner (Marchini) is in Colombia Punchfighting for money and generally looking for a new assignment. His old buddy Bill Digger (Estevez) contacts him about a missing government agent, Jennifer Boyden (Gaunt). It affects both of them personally because she’s the daughter of their old Marine Sergeant. Digger has already sent another soldier to try and find her, a man named Edwards (Rogers). But Edwards was captured by the evil super-criminal Pike (Meyer). When even Digger falls into the hands of Pike, Jake Turner now has to save him, Edwards, and Jennifer. He certainly has his work cut out for him. Can Jake save the hostages and finally defeat Pike? Find out today!

Sadly, Karate Raider was Ron Marchini’s last film role. But it’s the first credit ever for Joe Carnahan, who wrote the movie with Marchini. Carnahan went on to direct Narc (2002) and become a big name in Hollywood. So, circle of life. It’s also the only role for one Shelly Gaunt, who played Jennifer. But it’s probably just as well. It’s pretty surprising, given Marchini’s off-screen status as a Martial Artist, and the penchant for Punchfighting movies at the time, that he never made an out-and-out movie about Punchfighting. Karate Raider is as close as we’ll get, with one scene. Then his film career ended, in our opinion, prematurely. But judging from Marchini’s vest and fedora, as well as the musical score, and the title of the movie, it seems this was his answer to Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981). While no one is going to mistake Marchini for Harrison Ford, there are still moments to be savored here.

On the cliche radar is the fact that Digger gets Turner for this mission because “he’s the best”. And you have to love a baddie that not only wears a tracksuit for the entire movie, but his eyepatch looks homemade from black construction paper. That sort of craftsmanship was truly Pike’s peak. Worth noting is the preponderance of great yells and screams in this movie. It’s not known whether these were written into the script by Carnahan and Marchini, but it seems in most of the fight scenes, at least one person does an extended (too long?) bellow of “Aaaaaaaaggggghhhhh......AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!” And this yelling is going on when there’s no bickering between the unlikable Jennifer and Marchini, or the shooting of baddies. So the formula seems to be kicking-punching-shooting-bickering-yelling, so it’s no surprise that the movie slumps at times, but utter absurdities like the helicopter/raft chase and Marchini’s completely unnecessary and amazingly wooden narration keep things afloat. Much like Jake Turner’s badass raft. (Yes, he has a badass raft. You got a problem with that?)

Also in the “Huh?” department is a brief sit-down role from Burt Ward. His front-and-center placement on some box art doesn’t exactly match his screen time. But I can see why the distributors did that. We can’t count the times We've been in a video store, just browsing, and we picked up a video that we've never heard of before and yelled “BURT WARD’s in this? Sold!” Or maybe we were just confusing him with Burt Young. Nevertheless, the presence of Ward is really, in actuality, just a testament to how much Marchini must have loved the old Batman TV show - let’s not forget Adam West is in Omega Cop (1990).

Karate Raider remains one of the rarest Marchini’s - to date it has only been released on VHS in the Netherlands, just like Jungle Wolf (1986). He must have an amazing fanbase in that part of the world. Regardless, it makes a decent enough capper to his screen career, but we have to say, we were left wanting more. Mr. Marchini, it’s never too late to come back.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Jungle Wolf (1986)

Jungle Wolf (1986)- * * *

Directed by: Charlie Ordonez

Starring: Ron Marchini, Tony Carreon, Romy Diaz, Joonee Gamboa, Dax Nicolas, Michael Bristow, and Laura Abeyta,



“I’m your travel agent” - Steve Parrish









In the Central American nation of San Sebastian, a group of violent rebels kidnap the American Ambassador, Ambassador Porter Worthington (Carreon). (You know he’s American because his name is Porter Worthington, so don’t think he was played by a non-American actor). The leader of the group is Hernandez (Diaz), who sports some intimidating facial hair and has unpredictable taste in hats. He wants the release of the prisoner Isidro Zapien (Gamboa) and will use entire armies of armed men to achieve his goal. Naturally, the one man who can rescue the Ambassador and save the country is Vietnam vet Steve Parrish (Marchini). He teams up with the beautiful Maria (Abeyta) and heads off into the jungle to fight the baddies. But he’s haunted by the ghosts of his past, especially as they relate to Forgotten Warrior (1986). Will he succeed?

Confusingly, Jungle Wolf uses a lot of recycled footage from the aforementioned Forgotten Warrior, but both movies were released the same year, 1986. Seeing as how Ron has the same yellow shirt in both movies, it’s safe to assume they were shot simultaneously, or at least very close together. This seems to be the beginning of his Steve Parrish character, who he played in at least four of his films. His son Zak (Nicholas) makes a brief appearance here, but the plot of Jungle Wolf II (AKA Return Fire, 1988) fleshes out the relationship a bit more. But technical details aside, Jungle Wolf takes the standard El Presidente/Jungle Slog so common in the 80’s, and gives it the old Marchini magic. The movie is almost plotless and could be described as incoherent. But it’s incoherent in a great way. As there seems to be no word to convey this idea, we’ll pioneer a new one, grincoherent.

We’re not sure if the grincoherence is helped or hurt by Marchini’s unnecessary and deadpan narration, the character of Agent Connover (Vance) who looks exactly like Rick Moranis, and of course the constant machine gun shooting. The highlight of the movie is the fist-pumping song “Back In Action” by Michael Bristow (a frequent Marchini collaborator who has worked with him in various guises both in front of and behind the camera). It sounds like a cross between Europe and the Scorpions, which is funny because as far as we know Bristow is American and the song was recorded in California. But that doesn’t stop Bristow from singing with a Klaus Meine-like accent. You gotta love it. When the song plays while Marchini changes into his all-black outfit (complete with horizontal pant-leg zippers) and gears up with guns and knives, you’ll be in action movie heaven. Thankfully it happens twice in the movie.

Why the movie is set in Central America but was shot in the Philippines remains unknown, and sadly this particular Marchini outing was not released in America. Fans in the Netherlands got to enjoy it, and it wasn’t until the advent of the internet that others could complete their Marchini collections. It was also the only Romarc movie not to be released here in the U.S. (that’s Marchini’s company, the word being a contraction of his first and last names). Lovers of low-budget and/or obscure action from the 80’s, and of course Mr. Marchini, will likely get a charge out of Jungle Wolf. For casual viewers, it may be better to start elsewhere. 

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Also check out a write-up from our buddy, Cool Target! 

Ninja Warriors (1985)

Ninja Warriors (1985)- * * *

Directed by: John Lloyd

Starring: Ron Marchini, Romano Kristoff, Mike Monty and Paul Vance









One-man wrecking crew and national treasure/hero Ron Marchini returns! This time he’s in the Philippines fighting ninjas. There’s some sort of secret scientific formula, and the baddies want it to take over the world. Lt. Kevin Washington (Vance), naturally, suspects ninjas are involved, so he goes to his friend Steve (Marchini) because he studied Martial Arts in Japan and is familiar with the ways of the ninja. Soon, bands of black-pajama’d assassins are tumbling around attempting to kill Steve. While Captain Henry Marlowe (Monty) doesn’t understand or approve (they never seem to, do they?), Steve realizes that in order to defeat the ninja, he must become the ninja. Who will be victorious - the ninja...or Steve?

Chalk up another winner for Marchini. Ninja Warriors is a ton of fun, with killer music, lots of ninja action, funny dubbing, and an almost-nonexistent plot that plays out like a slightly more coherent Godfrey Ho film. In many so-called “ninja” movies, the ninjas themselves don’t do very much. Not so here. The ninjas are all over the place, rolling underground like Bugs Bunny (one of our favorite ninja moves), wearing gas masks, throwing stars and ball bearings, digging holes, jumping out of trees and so much more. You definitely get a lot of bang for your ninja buck, and with the mandate to make a ninja movie, director Lloyd went all out, thus ensuring that Ninja Warriors is at the top of the 80’s Ninja Boom pack.

Plus there are a lot of other little winning details, such as the same framed picture of Ronald Reagan that is in EVERY office building, regardless of where it is...it’s so prominent, it could have been credited as having a supporting role. Mike Monty even picks it up at one point to check it for ninja booby traps! Nick Nicholson’s beard/mustache looks extra-evil here, and there’s a drunk guy who sings the most amazingly soulful version of “Happy Birthday” ever committed to film. And lest we forget Ronald L. Marchini’s wardrobe, featuring the greatest shorts known to man. All these little bits make Ninja Warriors a winning addition to anyone’s collection.

Apparently this was part of the “Sybil Danning’s Adventure Video” series, but ours did not have the Danning intro/outro, sadly. If you do pick up the VHS, try and make sure that’s included, but we’re not sure how to ensure that. Nevertheless, Ninja Warriors is a gem. Let said warriors cartwheel their way into your heart.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Also check out a write-up from our buddy, Fist Of B-List!

Murder In The Orient (1974)

Murder In The Orient (1974)-* * *

Directed by: Manuel Songco

Starring: Ron Marchini and Leo Fong













During World War II, When the Japanese were fighting in the Philippines, they buried a stash of gold. They decided to abandon the traditional "treasure map", deciding instead to engrave directions to the loot on two separate samurai swords. Now, in the swingin' seventies, the nefarious Golden Cobra Gang has one of the swords. They desperately want the other one. Gustavo, a higher-up in the organization, really wants to please the head boss, King Cobra, so he pulls out all the stops to get the missing sword: he brings in Kang the Butcher, a ruthless assassin, and of course Turko. But he makes a fatal error in his quest. He kills the sister of Lao Tsu (Leo Fong, not the ancient philosopher...interesting character name choice).

Now Tsu, a peaceful Hong Kong martial arts instructor, must travel to Manila to get revenge. On top of that, the American Paul Martelli (Ron Marchini, in another stretch) is caught up in the madness because he was involved with Tsu's sister. Now Martelli and Tsu must take on the Golden Cobra Gang. Can they do it? Who will get the sword? Who will get the Japanese gold? Where does the gang find an endless array of goons willing to fight Marchini and Fong?

This movie is pretty taxing for your ears. The sound is horrid, it sounds like it was recorded in a bathroom using the first tape recorder ever made. Add to that, most of the cast has a thick accent. Even in the dubbing, which doesn't help. The many jarring jump-cuts don't help either. So a big percentage of the movie is unhearable. And don't try raising the volume. Sure, Ron Marchini doesn't talk much in the movie, but that's probably for other reasons. But every little bit helps.

Acting-wise, it truly is a case of "flat and flatter", as the filmmakers found the two action stars, nay, PEOPLE on the planet with the most flat, wooden delivery ever. And they talk to each other. And we try to hear them. What a mess. But it's a fairly fun mess. Marchini and Fong have one short fight scene, before they realize they must team up, and it's okay, not great. It should have been longer and more dynamic.

A martial arts adventure tailor-made for drive ins, this has a very seventies feel, which is one of the big selling points of the film. People wear shirts and dresses with wild, colorful patterns and huge collars, and the soundtrack is funky. Marchini gets yet another torture scene for his resume. It must be in his contract.

So it's not great, but don't scrutinize it too closely. At a scant 73 minutes, why not add another Fong/Marchini movie to your collection, especially if it's one of those cheap gas-station DVD's?

NOTE: One of the main people the filmmakers choose to thank in the end credits is the "Philippines Mental Health Association, Inc." If you make it all the way through Murder In the Orient to see this credit, it makes a disturbing amount of sense.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Return Fire: Jungle Wolf II (1988)

Return Fire: Jungle Wolf II (1988)-* * *1\2

Directed by: Neil Callaghan

Starring: Ron Marchini, Adam West, Dax Nicholas, and D.W. Landingham













The living legend, Ron Marchini, returns for his most enjoyable movie to date!

Steve Parrish (The Marchster) returns home to the San Francisco area after his many travails fighting in Central America. All he wants to do is see his young son Zak (Nicholas). However, gang boss Petroli (Landingham) has it out for Parrish. He sends all the baldest, fattest, oldest goons after Parrish to exterminate him. But Parrish is one...clever...man. Somehow they manage to kidnap Zak, so Parrish teams up with his love interest Teri (Lynn O'Brien) to fight the baddies and save Zak. Shortly after that,  he finds Zak and they team up to take on the bad guys! Also, corrupt government agent Carruthers (West) has his own stake in both the fates of Petroli and Parrish. Where do his true loyalties lie?

Return Fire: Jungle Wolf II is way, way more entertaining and fun than it has any right to be. It's fast paced, almost in spite of itself. The movie kicks off with a bang with the rockin' tune "Return Fire" (seemingly a knockoff of Dokken's "Into the Fire") over a montage of clips from the first Jungle Wolf (1986). Before you can say "30% New Footage", we're thrown into an inexplicably long action/chase scene with absolutely no explanation of what's going on or why any of this is happening. Also, as if that wasn't enough Marchini gives some deadpan narration (just in the beginning of the film, and written by Paul Kyriazi) which doesn't really help matters. If anything, it confuses them further. Then there's another montage to another fist-pumping rocker ("Fight to the Finish", both songs by the band Gunslinger) as Carruthers leaves an answering machine message!

The pacing and structuring of the film, as well as the non-acting, gives the impression it was made by children with no formal moviemaking experience. No matter, just throw a hammy Adam West into the mix and you truly have a recipe for insanity. How could it NOT be totally insane?

Marchini bellows "Where's my boy??!!!???!!" with more enthusiasm than ever before, and, the first half of the movie at least,  predates Ransom (1996) by eight years. The whole movie has a screw loose and this is further compounded by the absurd music cues. They blare on at inappropriate times and feel very Scooby-Doo-ish. (Isn't the name "Old Man Carruthers" even from Scooby-Doo?)I think they were lifted from such TV classics as Adam-12 or The Rockford Files.

Sure, it has some classic cliches as Carruthers saying to Parrish "We go back a long way", Parrish going on "one last mission" and the famous abandoned warehouse, Petroli's hideout. Landingham gives his best-ever performance as Petroli. Sadly, Landingham passed away this past June in his and Marchini's hometown of Stockton, CA where a majority of this film, and other Marchini classics, were lensed.

It all comes to a head in an "urban western" style in a dusty village. A genuinely interesting plot point is that Parrish and his son, who looks like he is about ten years old, team up to fight their enemies as if they were adult equals. The elder Parrish gives his tot grenades, bombs and guns without a single word of warning. He must be superdad. They even dress alike (yellow shirt and tan pants...we assume it's the same yellow shirt Marchini wore in Forgotten Warrior (1986), making another appearance. It's his action shirt, evidently.)

Sadly, this is director Callaghan's only directorial effort. What could he have created had he been able to continue? For that nutty feeling only AIP movies can provide, Return Fire: Jungle Wolf II delivers the goods in spades.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Omega Cop (1990)

Omega Cop (1990)-* * *

Directed By: Paul Kyriazi

Starring: Ron Marchini, Stuart Whitman, Troy Donahue, D.W. Landingham, Chuck Katzakian, Francisco Ramirez, and Adam West





"The year is 1999...John Travis is the toughest cop alive...he is the ONLY cop alive!"







Starting with some very funny Adam West narration about global warming (written by West himself), we are first introduced to the crazy world of John Travis (Marchini), whose saga even extends to another movie, Karate Cop (1991).



Travis is part of a team of aptly-named "Special Police" run by Prescott (West). They patrol the post-apocalyptic wasteland while listening to incredibly catchy Beach Boys-type songs, and fight the scavs, who are homeless baddies. When called to break up an auction of slave women (Marchini must have a fetish for bondage as he himself is tied up in both this film and Forgotten Warrior), his team, including a guy who resembles a bulked-up Dave Coulier, are shot and killed. Thus leaving Travis as...wait for it...THE ONLY COP ALIVE!

Travis's trademark weapon is a bunch of pipes barely held together by electrical tape, meant to be some sort of multi-barreled shotgun. He is put in charge of the safety of two women, causing him to say in his trademarked deadpan monotone: "I feel like Mother Goose." Their hideout is a baseball dugout, which is apparently immune from radiation of any kind. Travis's goal is to defeat the dastardly Wraith (Chuck Katzakian, the head crime boss in Death Machines) and try to bring the girls to Montana where there is apparently fresh air and water. Will Travis succeed or die trying?



If you printed the word "silly" onto a piece of film, it wouldn't be nearly as silly as Omega Cop. The scavs have funny, nonsensical makeup and Wraith looks 75 years old, and is draped in leather. A major plot point in the movie is Travis's hat. He spies a punk scav wearing his "Special Police" cap and says: "That-guy-has-my-hat". (Remember the monotone.)



For some reason Troy Donahue and Stuart Whitman are on hand to class up the movie, but in actuality, are further muddying their careers. One feels especially bad for Whitman, in his role as a doctor. He is forced to wear ridiculous makeup and spout inane dialogue about the environment.

Like Mickey Rooney in Maximum Force (1992) and Joe Estevez in Money To Burn (1996), Adam West never leaves his one room set. He never talks to Marchini face-to-face.

West's one-roomer is welcome but the movie could've used more West antics. He says he can't leave the room because of "Solar Flares". Very convenient. His bolo tie and mullet are not enough.

Omega Cop is a supremely wacky, fun, bizarre, Marchini triumph for the ages!

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Forgotten Warrior (1986)

Forgotten Warrior (1986)-* * *

AKA: U.S. Warrior and Commander Rainbow

Directed by: Nick Cacas and Charlie Ordoñez

Starring: Ron Marchini





"The rainbow is good luck."







Steve Parrish (Marchini) is fighting in Vietnam in 1974. He is injured and after a six-month recovery in a small village, he decides to stay behind and marry a local woman. He teaches the whole village martial arts including a small boy who resembles Scott Baio and has the fan favorite bowl haircut.



Everything is going swimmingly, and Steve is enjoying his only piece of clothing, a bright yellow sleeveless shirt, when peace is disrupted. His old 'Nam buddy Thompson, who now works for the Pentagon, and is now evil, tries to find Parrish and along the way works with the local army of baddies run by Col. Minh. Parrish gets really teed off when Thompson rapes and kills his wife. Now, Steve is a one-man-force to be reckoned with.



Marchini yells, many huts explode, and there is a very high kill count. In fact the baddies keep coming and coming, and they are more endless than Olive Garden breadsticks. Didn't we learn anything from the Orange Grove Chase from that same year's Cobra (1986)?

'Warrior is just as good a Rambo knock-off as Final Mission (1984). Marchini even ties a scrap of his yellow shirt around his head very tightly a la John Rambo, later parodied in one of the Hot Shots! movies.

Marchini's Ron-Fu is at its absolute peak here. His skills are never bettered in his later films. Once again, like Death Machines, there is a freeze frame at the end of the movie. This time there are actual credits over it. Marchini is improving.

For 80's fun-action-Vietnam-VHS-silliness, it is hard to do better than Forgotten Warrior.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Death Machines (1976)

Death Machines (1976)-* * *

Directed by: Paul Kyriazi

Starring: Ron Marchini, Chuck Katzakian, Michael Chong, Joshua Johnson, and Eric Lee










"Nothing and Nobody can stop them!"



"The Death Machines" are three men that dress in black and work for an Oriental woman with big hair. They know Kung-Fu and many other ways to kill. Also it is basically impossible to kill them. They are almost supernatural.

They are going around town killing gangsters in funny ways. Most notably, crushing a guy in a phone booth with a bulldozer. The head gangster meets with the Oriental lady and tries to convince her to have the Death Machines (or DM's for short) stop killing his men.

Soon there is a big brawl in a karate studio where the DM's kill everybody except one man who loses his hand in the fight. While in the hospital, he begins a romance with the nurse taking care of him. He then vows to get revenge on the Death Machines. Also, two detectives are assigned to the case to see what the heck is going on.

Could this be Ron Marchini's greatest role ever? The only thing he "says" in the movie is when he screams "Raaaaaa!!!" like a banshee. Other than that, it is a totally silent performance. He lets his ballet-like karate moves do all the talking. Marchini has never been more light on his feet and graceful. His Ron-Fu really shines in this effort.




There are a lot of great 70's suits and mustaches, and the keyboard soundtrack really stands out. There are some fun brawls and action sequences, including a scene with a certain fan-favorite weapon: a rocket launcher.

A memorable scene occurs when Marchini just wants to sit in a diner and very slowly eat his hamburger. Without any provocation on Marchini's part, a bunch of sleazy and crude bikers hassle him by calling him "Tarz'n" repeatedly. On the soundtrack there is a song about the holy trinity and then all three Death Machines kick into action and beat up all the bikers. Funnily enough, there is a biker who wears a jean jacket with no shirt underneath, and only the bottom snap is holding it all together.

Another worthy beat-em-up scene involves the guy with one hand (his one glove pre-dates Michael Jackson) and some local toughs who just want to trash their local watering hole. After turning over some tables and smashing the front window to pieces for no apparent reason, he punches Hand-man and he lies on the bar unconscious. There is a fountain behind him and it appears that the water is being spurted out his nose. His girlfriend comforts him, but the scene is very comical.



When the movie finally ends, there is an always-welcome freeze frame. But in a shocking twist, it overstays its welcome. There are no end credits at all, but the freeze frame is there for about the same length as the credits would be. So it is a very, very long shot of the Death Machines in their spiffy suits.

Interestingly, the trailer makes it seem like it is a futuristic sci-fi thriller. What it is, is a very fun, ridiculous, silly action-packed drive-in flick 70's style.

If you have any appreciation for this kind of movie, you will be sure to love "Death Machines"!


Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Karate Cop (1991)

Karate Cop (1991)-* * 1\2

Directed By: Alan Roberts

Starring: Ron Marchini, David Carradine, Michael Foley, and D.W. Landingham




"Martial Law At Its Most Lethal!"









Karate Cop is the creme de la creme of crud. It is so incredibly bad, it is hard to fathom. You gotta love it! (or do you?)

This is a sequel to the previous year's Omega Cop (1990) also featuring Marchini as John Travis, the last cop on earth. There must have been a public outcry for more "Marchini Madness". Thankfully he answered the call.

When this installment begins, some baddies are chasing two women. Right when they are closing in, John Travis appears and says a classic introductory line: (Read in the most flat monotonous tone you can) "Can I help you guys?" You hear people at fast food joints deliver that line with more passion and conviction.

It appears Travis is the last cop in a post-apocalyptic world. You can tell because his homemade (?) hat proudly announces he is "Special Police". Special indeed. He's hiding out in an abandoned warehouse of course. He's there with a woman named Rachel and a gaggle of children. In the future innocent tots are called "Freebies" and the baddies are called "Scavs" (not to be confused with Neon City (1991) where the baddies are called "Skins".) The head of the Scavs is a portly man named Lincoln (Landingham) who resembles a sillier version of Accept's Udo Dirkschneider, and his right-hand man is named "Snaker" who has a very irritating and loud voice. It already grates on your nerves the moment you hear him. Just imagine "Jar-Jar Binks" yelling into 5 megaphones.


In order to save the Freebies, Travis must find a magic crystal that powers a Star Trek-like teleporting device. The plan is to teleport them to Oregon because apparently the apocalypse hasn't yet reached Oregon. Before that can happen, Travis has to battle through "Trade Town" and fight the Scavs. We don't know how far "Trade Town" is from Oregon. But it must be pretty far. Luckily, "If anyone can make it, it's John Travis!" Along his magical journey, he has to defuse a bomb that doesn't go off and stops at a roadside diner run by "Dad" played by David Carradine. The only thing they serve there is something called "Jacky Rabbit Stew". "Dad" gives Travis a big bowl of it, and he refuses to choke it down, and a fight ensues.


 Meanwhile, Rachel is kidnapped and held captive by Lincoln. Lincoln passes the time watching cage fighting matches. Whoever wins the cage fight gets Rachel as the prize. Travis has to rescue her from the clutches of the biggest meanest scav in town who wins all the cage fighting matches. Unfortunately Lincoln's compound is guarded by guys in used sporting equipment with spray-painted football helmets. Travis invades the compound and more fights ensue. Will Travis put the crystal in the teleporter in order to ship the freebies to Oregon, or will Lincoln win out?

One of the most annoying aspects about the movie is that Travis is very unlikable. He whines and complains about every single task he has to do, most of which ends with the phrase "she said". For example, "It will be easy she said, diffuse the bomb she said" etc. Thusly the audience never gets behind him as a hero we can believe in. He comes off as a jerk. Also, he seems a bit old to be capering around in "Trade Town". He looks like he is in his fifties. His "Special Police" cap is probably there to hide his balding head. Maybe that explains all the complaining. His acting makes Chuck Norris look like a master thespian. His delivery is more wooden than a lumber yard. It must be hard to make a futuristic sci-fi epic with no budget. They spent it all on Carradine and the hat. His best moment is when he jumps off a building and goes "AAAAhhh!!!!!"



After all this ridiculousness, the end credits feature an R&B slow jam extolling the virtues of The Karate Cop.

Ron Marchini is a national treasure and so is this VHS tape. Find it today!


Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett