Nam Angels (1989)

Nam Angels (1989)-* * *

Directed by: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: Brad Johnson, Rick Dean, and Vernon G. Wells 











During the Vietnam war, Lt. Calhoun’s (Johnson) men are taken prisoner by a tribal group run by “A mysterious white man” who is also a “round-eye”, named, oddly, Chard (Wells). The top brass considers the trapped men “expendable” but Johnson does the only logical thing: he recruits four Hell’s Angels for a five-day mission and bribes them with millions of dollars of gold dust hidden in the hills of ‘Nam. All they have to do is help Calhoun rescue his men. The ‘Angels reluctantly agree, and there is some trouble and strife along the way, but a badass from West Texas who fights with a lasso and sawed-off shotgun (that would be Calhoun), teaming up with some tough biker dudes is going to be a double-team that will prove tough to beat. Will Calhoun’s gamble work?

At first, this Cirio movie seems to be yet another Vietnam/jungle slog that seems very familiar. But once the bikers come into the equation, things change for the better and you realize that you should be giving the filmmakers points for originality. It was only natural: take two exploitation genres - the (Vietnam) War movie and the Biker movie, and simply find a way to mash them together and make it work. Thankfully, it does, and Roger Corman can put this one in his win column.

Brad Johnson looks like a young Tom Berenger, but this isn’t exactly Platoon (1986). Vernon G. Wells is properly evil, especially with his ponytail. Amidst the classic barfights and “pew-pew!” shooting scenes, at least on the Corman-released DVD we saw, we noticed some odd editing. It looked like the opening credits and perhaps some other scenes were re-edited for this DVD release. We can’t confirm this, and it’s doubtful they cut out anything good, but it would be interesting to see a different print.

If you read our Operation Warzone (1988) review, you’ll remember how we discussed that movie’s highly inappropriate soundtrack, with 80’s synthesizers blaring in ‘Nam. Well, Nam Angels falls into that same trap. But if you’re looking for logic, why are you watching this movie in the first place?  There are a lot of nonsensical things going on here, from the plot itself to the John Milton quote at the end. But bikers poppin’ wheelies in the jungles of ‘Nam is cool enough to make up for it.

Nam Angels is worth checking out.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

Night Wars (1988)

Night Wars (1988)-* *1\2

Directed by: David A. Prior

Starring: Dan Haggerty, Brian O'Connor, Cameron Smith, Jill Foors, and Chet Hood













Jim Lowery (Smith) and Trent Matthews (O’Connor) are ‘Nam buddies who, nine years after the war, are both  haunted by the specter of their compatriot Jhonny O‘Connor (that’s how they spell his first name, it’s not a typo) (Hood). Jim and Trent must feel guilty for Jhonny’s becoming a POW. But when their dreams are so vivid, their injuries and cuts appear in their waking lives, they know there’s a serious problem. The torment of rogue mercenary McGregor (Horton) and his torture tactics have gotten to Jim and Trent so badly, Trent’s concerned wife Susanne (Foors) calls in psychologist Dr. Mike Campbell (Haggerty) for help. But the boys must “sleep together” in their fatigues to defeat the enemies in their dreams. When dreams and real life blur, who knows what the truth really is?

Night Wars is a good attempt at seriousness from AIP, but, once again, comes off as silly most of the time. That might be because of the constant, uncanny casting of goofy-looking sweaty people in almost every role. But there are some cool ideas and effects mixed in with the standard machine-gun firefights. This movie asks the question: what if the emotional trauma of returning Vietnam vets mutated into an actual, physical horror after the war? Try to imagine Jungle Assault (1989) crossed with A Nightmare On Elm Street (1984).
What if Freddy Krueger was a Vietnam vet?

The role of Jim Lowery should have been played by Wings Hauser, and he and Trent surely are the Bill and Ted of AIP movies, but mention (not necessarily honorable) must go to Dan Haggerty as the “cool” psychologist with the necklace and the pared-down beard. He’s really showing his range here. He’s not Grizzly Adams or the guy from Elves (1989). He’s a doctor. It’s really one of his best sweaters, er, performances.

There are the prerequisite torture sequences, but this time, they are really heaped on. There’s also the typical jungle/war cliches, but this time they are mixed with a dash of spookiness. Also it must be noted that this film has the most amount of people bellowing “NOOOOooooo!!!!!” that we’ve seen to date - it occurs four times during the movie.

While the ideas in Night Wars can’t exactly be described as original (many are lifted wholesale from Elm Street), the attempt to marry the Vietnam war film with the phantasmagoric dream film gives this AIP outing an interesting and noteworthy edge above some of the others. It really gives new meaning to the term “Dream Warriors”. Dokken take note.

For a war/horror hybrid film served up AIP style, look no further than Night Wars.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Operation Warzone (1988)

Operation Warzone (1988)-* *

Directed by: David A. Prior

Starring: Joe Spinell, Fritz Matthews, William Zipp, Sean Holton, and Chet Hood



"They Told 'Em War Was Hell...They Were Right!"

Get ready for yet another romp in the jungle courtesy of  David Prior and AIP. In this particular Vietnam war scenario, Sgt. Holt (Matthews), Cpl. Butler (Zipp) and Cpl. Adams (Holton), among other soldiers, are bravely fighting in the impossible conditions of the ‘Nam jungles. During a firefight, they rescue two Tunnel Rats, Jenson (King) and Hawkins (Cianetti). It comes to light that there is a mysterious, unseen man, dubbed “The General” that has classified documents that could supposedly end the war. Much of the madness can be traced back to Washington and the corrupt George Delevane (Spinell). In a Firehawk-like situation, the soldiers don’t know who to trust, and there could be a conspiracy that goes all the way to the top. Will Holt and the boys make it home alive? Or will the behind-the-scenes dealings get the better of everyone?

Mindless shooting. Exploding huts. Endless machine gun firefights. Uninteresting explosions. Brain-numbing stupidity. Inexcusable boredom. Zero character development. Unexplained Australians. Goofy chases. Prerequisite torture sequence. An unnecessary fistfight scene that is so absurdly extended it makes the “put on the glasses” scene from They Live (1988) look like a blip. These are some basic snapshots that should give you some idea of the “we have to sit through it” vibe of Operation Warzone.

Matthews, Zipp and Holton are all AIP regulars, doing many things both in front of and behind the camera. It seems, contractually, Zipp cannot be in a movie that doesn’t take place in a jungle. So he must have been right at home. Holton looks completely different that he did in White Fury (1990). In ‘Fury he’s a snot-nosed little punk, and here he has an adult mustache and appears at least ten years older - but ‘Warzone  came out two years BEFORE White Fury! How quickly they grow up...or something like that. The legendary and excellent actor Joe Spinell is on hand, and his presence is much appreciated, but it’s what we call a “sit-down” role. In other words, in many instances, from Mickey Rooney in Maximum Force (1992), to Henry Silva in The Violent Breed (1984), to Spinell here (just to name a few), the movie production will hire a name actor to do some scenes over the course of a day or two, give or take. But all the actor’s scenes are sitting down. They never leave their chair. It just kind of exposes the penury of a given production. Here Spinell gives his sit-down role, which is better than many of the other actors’ more action based scenes, but the bottom line is the movie definitely could have used much more Spinell.

Another thing worth mentioning is the highly inappropriate music. Although the movie is set in 1960’s Vietnam, a happy, upbeat, jaunty 80’s synthpop song that sounds exactly like Wham!’s “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go” blasts onto the soundtrack. I know it seems incredible, but it’s true. What were they thinking? That being said, Steve McClintock’s closing credits dirge “Shadow Of A Doubt” is catchy and one of the best things about Operation Warzone. You gotta hand it to AIP. Almost all their movies have at least one catchy, memorable, original song. It’s really a fairly dependable thing. No matter how “bad” the movie is, at least there will be a song. When is someone going to release a CD, “AIP’s greatest hits”? It would be amazing!

Dumb on top of dumb on top of dumb, Operation Warzone is a misfire.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

No Dead Heroes (1986)

No Dead Heroes (1986)-* * *

Directed by: Junn B. Cabreira

Starring: Max Thayer, John Dresden, Toni Nero, Steve Rogers, Mike Monty, and Nick Nicholson














Really cool movie alert! Fans of Invasion U.S.A. (1985) (i.e., everyone that's ever seen it) are sure to love this one as well.

When ridiculously evil Russian General Ivan Dimanovitch (Nicholson), who naturally runs a prison camp in Vietnam, is holding an American CIA agent in his horrid cages, badass soldier dudes Richard "Ric" Sanders (Thayer) and Harry Cotter (Dresden) are sent in by their commanding officer Baylor (Monty) to save the man and free the camp - in the next 24 hours. If the man succumbs to the torture tactics of Dimanovitch, he could spill information sensitive to the U.S. Just when we as viewers are acclimating to this, we see a title on screen - TEN YEARS LATER (!)

Dimanovitch has captured Cotter and he makes him undergo a surgical procedure in which a microchip is implanted at the base of his skull. This chip turns him into an emotionless killing machine controlled by a Casio wristwatch. Of course, Dimanovitch is wearing the watch and pressing the buttons. The plan is a total commie takeover of the world, and since he hates religion, to use Cotter to assassinate the Pope. So Baylor sends Sanders, now a private citizen, into the fray to take down all the baddies and stop Cotter. With the help of Barbara (Nero) and of course an arsenal of machine guns larger than most armies, will they be able to stop the nefarious evil planning to take over the world?

If movies were judged by the amount of people that die in them, No Dead Heroes would win awards. The kill count is huge, and there are even surprising lashings of gore. Try to imagine a cross between Wardogs (1986) and Invasion U.S.A. With maybe a dash of The Devastator (1985) thrown in for good measure.

The movie starts with an explosion in the first second, and many more follow throughout the majority of the film's running time. In the funny department, even though he is an evil commie rapist, just look at Dimanovitch's henchman Lopez. He is an obese, bearded man that looks like Castro. Speaking of which, No Dead Heroes shares Invasion U.S.A.'s patriotism, and the prerequisite speeches are made against America, capitalism and religion...all this angers super-patriot Sanders who truly is a one-man army. Additionally, since his buddy's name is "Harry Cotter", every time they say it, it's hard not to imagine the beloved, bespectacled children's character (with one letter different, of course) massacring people and attempting to knock over the PopeMobile.

You're really not a super-villain unless you have a terrorist training camp (or, in the case of American Ninja (1985), a Ninja training camp) and when Sanders and Barbara show up with guns blazin', that will certainly knock you off the monkey bars!

Behind the camera, we have producer Anthony Maharaj, responsible for some Richard Norton epics, including Not Another Mistake (1988). Apparently he likes being involved in movies where there are "No" something or "Not" something. It's quite a formula for success. Also there is a credit in the movie for, and I quote, "Meal Checker". Maybe there was a mad poisoner going around bent on the indigestion of Max Thayer, so it's good the production sprang for him.

For classic 80's uber-patriotic shoot-fests that require zero brain power, (and, thankfully there is zero irony), top marks go to the impressive No Dead Heroes.

Comeuppance Reviews by: Brett and Ty

Getting Even (1988)

Getting Even (1988)-* * *

Directed by: Leandro Lucchetti

Starring: Richard Roundtree, Michael Aronin, George Ardisson, Deborah Keith and Harrison Muller Jr.










Roy Evans (Muller) is a Vietnam vet who spent five years in a prison camp. He has flashbacks of those dark times often, and he recalls a time when he tried to carry his wounded buddy to a chopper before it took off. Unfortunately, it was piloted by the sinister Slisko (Aronin), a man who you can tell is evil by his name. Slisko literally kicks them off the chopper and he takes off. 

Now, in the present day, some psycho is roaming around NYC leaving a trail of dead prostitutes in his wake. And they all have a unique signature: the knife wounds are made by a curved knife called a "criss". Could it be the work of the nefarious Slisko? Evans and 'Nam buddy Dundee (Roundtree) want answers - and revenge. But they must answer to the mysterious FBI agent Roberts. So after tracking him all over the city, their quest leads them to Bangkok where they meet up with Pearl (Keith), a beautiful woman who's handy with a machine gun. They then learn Slisko is running weapons to the guerillas. So with machine guns a blazin' and huts a-explodin', the deadly trio get to the truth - in the most violent way possible, of course.

Of the two Richard Roundtree/Harrison Muller Jr. team-ups, this one is far better (than its counterpart, Miami Cops, 1989). This one is more of a pure action movie, with plenty of bullet hits and blow-ups, and quasi-Rambo stylings. Muller Jr. and Roundtree should be using a machine gun and a rocket launcher, respectively, not tooling around Detroit pretending it's Miami. Maybe that's a bit unfair, but what's interesting about Getting Even is that they must go back to Asia and defeat the baddies using the techniques they originally learned in 'Nam. Circle of life. Or death, more accurately. It even ends in the time-tested "Final Field Fight". But what is the final twist?

Of course, there is the prerequisite funny dubbing, and the funny dialogue they are dubbing with (in a Vietnam flashback, a character yells out "The Radio Shack is right up ahead!"...that's really funny), and, like Miami Cops, the film quality is not great. Speaking of funny things, you wouldn't think, of Muller Jr. and Roundtree, that Muller would have the thicker, fuller afro, but there it is.

This may seem weird, but in some of the actions of the characters, it resembles the NES game "Renegade". To add weird on top of weird, Muller's character drives a "Renegade" Jeep! Could that possibly be a coincidence? And in the "there were three Vietnam buddies but now one is evil and the other two have to deal with it" sweepstakes, Getting Even certainly gives American Eagle (1989) a run for its money.

So if you must see a team up of the charismatic Roundtree and the "why is he here?" Muller, see this one.

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

American Eagle (1989)

American Eagle (1989)-* * *

Directed by: Robert J. Smawley

Starring: Asher Brauner, Robert F. Lyons and Vernon G. Wells





"Take Cover, The Eagle Flies Again!"

"When You're The Best In The Business, There Are Only Two Choices...Win Or Die."

 



Max "The Eagle" Shane (Brauner) is a surly mercenary with a mullet. He goes around the world to hellholes like Angola and Nicaragua cleaning up problems - with bullets. He's a Vietnam vet, and his fellow Vietnam buddy Johnny Burke (Wells) is now a high-powered bad guy who runs drugs, guns ("war is a very profitable business") and is involved in kidnapping. He also hates Shane because of an incident that occurred back in 'Nam. So Burke kidnaps Rudy's sister Angela (Baker) and a bunch of other fashion models, and Shane goes on a mission with his friend Rudy (Lyons) to the Ivory Coast in Africa to stop the bad guys and end the conspiracy.

Asher Brauner makes quite the hero. All he does is smoke, drink and eat meat. He even asks Rudy at one point "Got any bacon?" This proves to be his catch phrase. It truly rivals "I'll be back". He loves sports and wears plenty of jerseys and caps. Interestingly, he seems a bit confused a lot of the time and says plenty of malapropisms. When someone says "news travels fast", instead of saying "what news?" (he's trying to get info), he says "how fast?" And when another character is dead silent, saying nothing, Shane says "I'll be the judge of that". Huh?

He makes a lot of funny faces and has a cool jacket. He looks like a cross between Nick Nolte, Stallone, Michael Madsen and David Hasselhoff. He gets into a grenade/knife fight. By that I mean he holds a grenade and his enemy holds a knife and they fight. We've never seen that before, I don't think. Pretty original.

Shane's partner Rudy basically IS Bob Eubanks. He looks so much like him. He and Shane are the original odd couple, as Eubanks, I mean Rudy is a health nut that exercises and drinks power-shakes made of fruit. But they work well together as they discuss sports as they torture a bad guy for information. If you've ever wanted to see Bob Eubanks shoot a machine gun and kill people, this is the movie for you. Notably, there are some pop culture references and even waterboarding in American Eagle. How ahead of its time. Asher is a visionary I tell you.

Normally we don't go into nerdy stuff like this, but you have to watch out for something really funny at an hour and seven minutes into the movie. There is the single most OBVIOUS dummy you've ever seen. It's laugh out loud funny. It's like something from a sketch on Conan.

Ending with a stirring, moving, tearjerking title song by Lionel Petersen, American Eagle is stupid (in a good way) action fun.

SPECIAL NOTE: The back of the DVD from Platinum disc is hilariously over the top and also riddled with errors. Firstly, the pictures shown are NOT from this movie, but the other Asher movie on Platinum, Merchants of War (1990). According to the person who wrote the back, "Asher Brauner wrote the BONE CHILLING screenplay". Also they misspell Spielberg as "Speilberg" and they even made up their own word: "Wearly"! And I quote (I couldn't make this up if I tried):

"The action avalanches from spectacular car crashes to fiery shootouts as Max, the wearly Eagle, must sharpen his talons anew for the most brutal fight of his life. Nothing has prepared you for the awesome impact of this adventure classic's explosive climax."

Are they overstating the case? Find out for yourself tonight!

Comeuppance Review by: Brett and Ty

American Commandos (1985)

American Commandos (1985)-* *

AKA: Back To Hell

Directed by: Bobby A. Suarez

Starring: Christopher Mitchum, Franco Guerrero, Willie Williams and John Phillip Law








"They're in a rage for justice!"

American Commandos is an interesting hybrid of two favorite B-action genres: the revenge movie and the back-to-Vietnam tale (with a bit of the old "ragtag team" thrown in for good measure).

Chris Mitchum plays Dean Mitchell (I know, quite a stretch), the one gas station attendant you don't wanna mess with. He's a taciturn Vietnam vet who doesn't say very much. When some stupid baddies DO decide to mess with him, they end up in a world of hurt. They try robbing his beloved gas station, and then they go after his family. Big mistake. Chandler, Speck and Buck (the evildoers' names) live to regret the day they went after him. So ends the Death Wish (1974) section of the film.



When "The Man" also known as Brady (Ken Metcalfe) who works for the government, gets wise to Mitchell's technically-unlawful revenge methods, he leverages that against him so that he can send Mitchell to the "Golden Triangle" to destroy a drug operation there. He literally asks them to "blow it up". Radical! ("You don't have a license to kill anymore" Brady tells Mitchell. Mitchell disagrees.) So he teams up with his old buddies Kelly (Law), Brutus (Robert Marius), Somsak (Guerrero of the Richard Norton classics Kick Fighter (1987) and Cross Fire (1988)) and Creeper (Williams). They have an awesome tank, much like the one in Bulletproof (1988) (But in this movie no one gets called a "Butthorn" - make of that what you will) that has missile launchers, hidden guns, cool armor and a space for a motorbike to bust out! Will this team survive not just the countless amounts of people shooting at them, but all the twists and turns in the plot as well?

We love Chris Mitchum. He closely resembles his father and also shares his trait of being a man of few words. It's a good antidote to the overly-verbose post-Tarantino movies of today. The character of Creeper dresses in sleeveless beer shirts (Olympia and Budweiser) or no shirt at all. He also has some cool slang ("Why you payin' cool green for a snap job?"). Speaking of cool clothes, John Philip Law - another one we always love seeing - has an extremely awesome T-shirt that simply says "AMERICA RULES!" I guess that's for when he goes to foreign countries so the baddies know who to shoot at.



So while the movie is an entertaining time, with the revenge movie section, the Golden Triangle section where they shoot millions of thugs and attempt to dismantle the heroin operation (all this when they're not getting numerous "massages" at the local whorehouse run by one of the heroes), there is one scene in particular that stands out - the one that is REPEATED! Yes, probably by accident, about an hour into the movie we see the same scene twice. Literally. This editing-room mistake makes for some laughs and extends the running time quite unnecessarily. It's really weird.

So if you want some kind of cross between Death Wish and Codename: Wildgeese (1984) starring some familiar faces, you'll surely like American Commandos.

Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett

Field Of Fire (1991)

Field Of Fire (1991)-* *

AKA: Battle Gear

Directed by: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: David Carradine, Joe Mari Avellana, Henry Strzalkowski, and Eb Lottimer









It seems our friend (at least he seems like our friend after spending this much time with him) Cirio H. Santiago can't leave the jungles of Vietnam. So many of his movies are romps in the jungle. Here we go again.

When Wilson (Jim Moss) AKA Ironhand, is stranded in the dense jungles of 'Nam, General Simmons (Carradine) (NOT "General Corman" as he is listed in some sources...remember Counter Measures (1999) and "Zach Silver"?) and his aide Willy send in yet another elite team to rescue the lost and nervous soldier. Meanwhile, the VC is closing in and they lose their radio communication. They have to get to the Laos border to a special meet point. Will they make it?

Unfortunately, Field of Fire AKA Battle Gear retreads a lot of the same ground we've seen before. It's not BAD per se, but it's pretty mediocre. For most of the movie, Carradine barks orders in one room. He does leave that room eventually, and it's a great moment. He also wears a funny Hawaiian shirt. Interesting.

There's also a lot of Vietnam slang. Characters mainly talk about LURPS and their Sandy's while Jolly Greens chase their Ironhand. I know, I'm confused too.

The leader of the jungle group is Duncan (Lottimer), or "Dunc" for short. I believe he was cast because he resembles Bruce Springsteen. Plus he has an interesting name. Then there's Jefe, a token man who speaks Spanish. He uses his language to confuse the enemy. Senator is played by Scott Utley. It's not one of the better 'Nam handles we've heard. Jimmy T is Don Barnes, the African-American who yells loudly while shooting his machine gun. Hawk is Henry Strzalkowski (a man who has been in a lot of DTV action movies but isn't a prominent name). Captain Phat (Avellana) is the evil baddie. Avellana also has a long and storied history as an actor/director in the DTV world.

Also, when the VC talks, there are WAY too many subtitles on the screen. We're pretty sure they're not saying all that stuff. Someone grunts and there's a paragraph.

You'd think a movie with this pedigree would be better. Field of Fire is generic Vietnam stuff with all the standard moments and no surprises and nothing memorable.

You could do worse, but this is pretty bland. For better Cirio, check out Final Mission (1984) or The Devastator (1985).

Comeuppance Review by: Ty and Brett

Fist of Glory (1991)

Fist of Glory (1991)-* *1\2

Directed by: Joe Mari Avellana

Starring: Dale "Apollo" Cook







"Welcome To The Apocalypse."





In this period piece set towards the end of the Vietnam war, Jake "Johnny" Reynolds (Cook) and his team are deep in the jungle fighting the VC in an unauthorized mission. During some generic Vietnam action that lasts over thirty minutes but somehow manages to completely sidestep anything resembling character development, there are constant firefights and explosions. Grass and dirt continually blow up, and it makes Eye Of the Eagle III (1989), Crossfire (1988) and Firehawk (1993) seem like episodes of Masterpiece Theatre. It gets quite brain-numbing.

Three months later, while on some temporary R&R, Jake decides to hit the town in Vietnam. He realizes his buddy "Mad Dog" Lee has been brainwashed, hooked on heroin and forced to fight in underground punchfighting matches, dubbed "Saigon's Awesome Arena of Blood". There are no rules and you must fight to the death. Concerned for his friend, Jake infiltrates the operation. He even hires a foreign trainer to help him. After nursing Lee back to health, they set out for revenge against the entire town.

In Apollo's first-ever movie role, he's as wooden and surly as ever. He has a funny haircut, and, like American Kickboxer 2 (1993), wears a pink shirt. Maybe it's in his contract.

The film boasts some decent stunts, and when the VC are shot they are a bit "flippier" than usual. They spin around a few extra times in this one. One soldier is even blown up and flies through the air in a sitting position. Just imagine Magik's immortal "sit-down dance" from Body Rock. (1984) Sure, there are constant blow-ups, but for what? Fist of Glory could have used a bit more character development and a few less unnecessary explosions. The punchfighting is a bit weak compared to some of the others in the meathead genre. However, in one match, the man Jake is fighting has "secret chilis". He has some hot peppers in a corner of the ring, and when Jake isn't looking, he eats them and then spits in his face. That was pretty novel.

In one of the battle scenes, only for a few seconds, we see a POV of Lee's machine gun. It seems it is attached to the camera. It is like a first-person shooter, which was very different in 1991. It also doesn't wear out its welcome. We enjoyed that.

Fist of Glory (whatever that means, the title doesn't make much sense) is fairly interesting because it is a hybrid Vietnam/Punchfighter, and because it is the first appearance of Dale "Apollo" Cook.


Comeuppance Review by: Brett & Ty

The Devastator (1985)

The Devastator (1985)-* * *

AKA: The Destroyers

Directed by: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: Rick Hill, Katt Shea, Crofton Hardesterm and Jack S. Daniels








One of the best things about The Devastator is that it is no-nonsense, no-frills action fun that packs a good punch at 79 minutes.

Deacon "Deke" Porter (Hill) is a Vietnam Vet, who heads into the sleepy little town of King's Ransom, California. He's there to investigate the death of his 'Nam buddy Marcus Dearing. Unfortunately, the town is run by a coterie of redneck pot growers, the ringleader being the nefarious John Carey (Hardesterm). They even have Sheriff Clay Marsh (Kaz Garas) in their pocket. They don't cotton to outsiders, so when Deke comes sniffing around their turf, a war ensues. Luckily, Deke has an ace in the hole: his old army buddies Spence (the electronics expert) and Ox (The goofy, loud punchfighter) (Daniels) to help him out.

Who will be victorious? The smarmy bastard John Carey or will the mighty hero Ox reign supreme?

Hill as Deke is bit bland to be an action hero and he has an unflattering overbite. This doesn't stop him from being a slickster with the ladies and wearing his Member's Only jacket while sitting on a chair backwards so he can "rap" with people. Thankfully Jack S. Daniels (great name) is an American treasure to be discovered again and again! We need more men like him in the movies and in real life.




While most films of this era were concentrating on evil cocaine-related baddies, The Devastator goes the opposite direction and shows evil pot growers. John Carey is a hilarious name for the main villain. When they say his name in the film, you think of the failed presidential candidate windsurfing, and throwing HIS Vietnam medals over a fence. Where are the Swift Boat Veterans For Truth when you need them?

Directed by prolific fan-favorite Cirio (we are on a first name basis), this bears a similarity to the classic Final Mission (1984), it even has the same gratuitous fan-favorite death, decapitation. One of the strongest aspects of the movie is that it has a double-revenge plot. Deke has to get revenge for his fallen buddy and for himself.

In the U.S., The Devastator was released on VHS in one of those great MGM\UA big boxes. You gotta love 'em. If you don't like VHS big boxes, you are a traitor to our great country.

Ox it up tonight with this classic!



Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett

Crossfire (1988)

Crossfire (1988)-* * *

AKA: Not Another Mistake

Directed By: Anthony Maharaj

Starring: Richard Norton










Fan-favorite Richard Norton stars as "Straker" (Pronounced "Striker", of course. This IS an action movie), a Vietnam vet with a chip on his shoulder since his wife and daughter were killed in a home invasion. He is then recruited to go BACK to Vietnam to rescue some POW/MIA's, including one Commander, Harrison. Figuring he has nothing to lose, he accepts the mission. The officer that is overseeing the mission, McCloud (of course that's his name), chose him because he's the best (of course), having performed special ops in operation "Black Thunder" back in the day. So, Straker dramatically vows "Not Another Mistake" and he's on his way!

Naturally, he is assigned a ragtag team to help him. They get absolutely no character development, even by action movie standards. The only one that stands out is Soleri, an "Italian Stallion" clearly modeled after John Rambo. He announces himself as a "general bad-ass". So, there you go.



Can Straker hold the team together, save the prisoners, and kill thousands of baddies in the process? Will he be successful in his new mission, "Operation 8-ball"? Find out tonight!



One thing doesn't make sense about Crossfire. If Straker and his team go BACK to Vietnam in the mid-to-late 80's, why are there thousands of Vietcong fighting them? Is the war still going on?

They had to do some contortions plot-wise to figure out a way to make proud Australian Richard Norton a member of the U.S. Military. Maybe the armed forces were confused because he looks like fellow armed forces member, Andy Levy of Fox News' Red Eye. He is so much of an exact doppelganger, it is truly uncanny. You expect at any moment he will break into the halftime report.



There are many references to First Blood (1982) and the Rambo films of the time (Soleri even says, apropos of nothing, to a baddie "I'm your worst nightmare", even though the baddie in question didn't ask him anything or say anything) as well as the A-team. There is a musical theme that plays a few times that is very reminiscent of the A-teams' classic da-da-d-da, duh duh DUH! The team Straker is in charge of also recalls that classic show.

Speaking of other movies and shows, the main Vietnam baddie plays chess. Just like in Eye of the Eagle III (1989)! What are the odds?!?!? Norton has a classic one liner relating to this as well. Crossfire also recalls the classic NES game "Jackal". The good guys ride around in a jeep and rescue the hostages. Long live the 80's!

The most obvious flaw in Crossfire is that it is overlong. The movie begins to repeat itself after awhile with endless scenes of shooting. If it had been trimmed in the editing room, it might be closer to classic status. But it does have an interesting and unorthodox ending, which was welcome. Watch out for more Richard Norton vehicles (not just his tanks and jeeps) in the future!

Comeuppance review by: Brett and Ty

Firehawk (1993)

Firehawk (1993)-* *1\2

Directed By: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: Martin Kove, Matt Salinger, and Terrence "TC" Carson












In the vein of other Cirio H. Santiago movies such as Final Mission (1984) and Eye Of The Eagle 3 (1989), here we have another Vietnam escapade in the jungle.

Martin Kove of Shootfighter (1992) fame stars as Stewart, a rescue 'copter pilot with an attitude who chomps down on his cigar. He may have a rough n' tumble demeanor but he seems to know the score. His crew is comprised of Tex (Salinger), who loves nothing more than to shoot VC with his machine gun. At odds with him is the moral medic Davis (Carson). Li is a former VC working with them. There's also Hobbs and Bates. Another member of the team, Jimmy, who closely resembles comedian Nick Dipaolo, is injured. While he is recuperating at the army hospital, he gets closer and closer to the truth about "Firehawk".

When their Heli is grounded in the middle of the jungle, The team must overcome their internal squabbling whilst fighting the enemy. Is there a traitor in their midst? And what is the secret of the term "Firehawk"?

Kove gets to do his best Hannibal impression while he leads his own "A-Team". This includes "helicopter flying faces". Just imagine "guitar face" but with a Heli instead. The poor audio mixed with the constant helicopter sounds, mixed with constant shooting, mixed with the fact that Kove always has a cigar in his mouth, means much of his dialogue is unintelligible. One disappointing aspect of the movie is that Kove's name isn't "Firehawk".



During one of their many gun battles, purple smoke starts billowing from the ground and someone says "it is a purple smoke trap!" Later, Carson gets to bellow fan favorite yell: "Nooooo!"

This 'Nam shoot-em-up reminds the viewer of classic NES shooters such as "Operation Wolf" and "Cabal".

Firehawk is a decent addition to the 'Nam movie boom of the late eighties and early nineties. It has more character development than most of its ilk. Yes, an endless amount of baddies get shot but an attempt is made at intelligence and plot twists.

Find out the secret of "Firehawk" tonight!


Comeuppance Review by: Brett & Ty

Final Mission (1984)

 Final Mission (1984)-* * *

Directed By: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: Richard Young, Jason Ross, John Dresden, Willie Williams, and Jack S. Daniels












"Armed with an MG-82---It will take an Army to stop him!"


Who can resist another story about a guy who comes back from Vietnam and gets revenge on some bad guys? NOT US!

Final Mission is trying to ride the coattails of the contemporary classic First Blood (1982). There are many similarities but 'Mission has its own charm.

Vince Deacon (Young) is fighting in the jungle of Laos. It turns out his former buddy Slater (Dresden) is a traitor working with the VC. After an unnecessary but surprisingly welcome decapitation, we are brought into present day L.A., where Deacon is a tough guy working for the LAPD SWAT team. He breaks up a kidnapping, dispatching the baddie with ease. He gets suspended for excessive force by classic Irish Captain, Captain O'Riley.

Deacon goes on a vacation with his wife and son (who has a bowl haircut) to Pinesville, a rural fishing area. The family is cavorting around and having a grand ole time, then tragedy strikes. A boat explosion kills Deacon's wife and son. Now Deacon is roaring through the small town and trying to get answers and bloody revenge. The sheriff in Pinesville, who resembles Bocephus-era Hank Williams Jr., is a corrupt yokel and his deputy "Moose" is no better. Slater lives on a ranch in town and the local police which may or may not include his brother are all against Vince. But Vince has two tricks up his sleeve, one is his partner Isaac (Ross) who comes to his aid, and the other trick is to break into a weapons store and steal a gigantic machine gun. Which is apparently called an MG-82. Most small town gun stores have an MG-82 and unlimited ammo right behind the glass.

What ensues is a barrage of gun-shooting, grenade-throwing violent assault and it goes so out of hand the Army has to step in to stop one man. It's the actual army vs. the steadily-going-insane one man army. Luckily, Vince is the woods just like in First Blood. Will the war ever be over for Deacon? Find out today!

One of the best parts of the movie is the theme song to Final Mission called "Always On My Mind" by Steve Butler. Not to be confused with the Willie Nelson song of the same name. This is a rockin' tune in the A.O.R. vein of Foreigner and Rainbow. The filmmakers know they have a hit song on their hands because they play it at least four times.

Accept this "Mission" and watch this classic tonight!

Extra Note: Some writing credits go to Anthony Maharaj, the co-conspirator of Richard Norton and writer/director of his classic film Kick Fighter (1987) and director of his film Cross Fire (1988), as well as Joe Mari Avellana of Field of Fire (1991) fame. Who could forget Captain Phat?

Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett

Eye Of The Eagle 3 (1989)

Eye Of The Eagle 3 (1989)-* *

AKA: Last Stand At Lang Mei

Directed By: Cirio H. Santiago

Starring: Carl Franklin and Frederick Bailey










Yes, there is an Eye Of The Eagle THREE! Why?! Why?! Whyyyyy?!

In the first 'Eagle, the only thing that happened was when a random soldier said "You killed my brother!" and then started shooting his AK-47 for 90 minutes. Obviously this warranted TWO sequels. People were clamoring for more!

In this installment of the 'Eagle trilogy, two divisions of gung-ho soldiers in 'Nam who look like David Arquette, Rob Schneider, Dick Butkus (of Hamburger: The Motion Picture fame), and Val Kilmer, plus token black guy Carl Franklin (who also co-wrote the movie) are shooting their sawed-off shotguns and digging latrine holes. When the Butkus lookalike gets thrown into a military prison, he is instantly replaced by a cocky young hotshot who closely resembles Owen C. Wilson. Both "Cold Steel" and "Red Thor" divisions miss their mustachioed leader, because the new guy is an attention-seeking and vain meanie who also is a a bit crazy.

To take out their frustrations, they mindlessly shoot Vietcong who look like they are on safari. The shootings and blow-ups take up most of the running time. There is little to no character development or plot, but somehow they managed to sneak in a subplot about their jailed commander where he tries to escape by talking to the guard named Kowalski (Frederick Bailey, who really stands out in this muck.) To continue the lookalike phenomenon of this movie, he closely resembles "Weird" Al.

As per usual in "Nam flicks, there is a scene where a buddy dies, and his comrade yells "NOOOOOOO!!!!" for a good 20 seconds. Not to be confused with the scene where the soldier sees a vision of himself dressed as a blue-skinned Indian and says in a very flat tone of voice "oh-no."

The leader of the Vietcong has a British accent in the second half of the movie and always plays chess. He eventually knocks over the board in disgust and has slicked back hair in the jungle.

Skip the other two "Eagles" and go straight to Eye of The Eagle 3. It may be boring and dumb at times, but it has silly moments that you can laugh at.


Comeuppance Review by: Ty & Brett